[JTL 197] Transcendence - the movie and beyond part 1

Recently I participated within the
Desteni I Process Live Hangout Movie review: Transcendence.

The hangout can be found here.
(The discussion's technical quality makes it quite challenging to walk, however the discussion is really on the topic!)

And some perspective about Transcendence by Bernard Poolman

Somehow for me, this word  relates to the Painting: Gauguin, Paul: Where Do We Come From? What Are We? Where Are We Going? - 1897

So, the movie called Transcendence: About reviews, critics - I've read a lot - just for curiosity - many seemed more like hypo-critics - read lot's of dislikes about the movie, many missed more action, which somehow requires for being counted as a 'blockbuster' - and even some reasoned with 'lack of explosions' - just because the director, Wally Pfister was the cinematographer for many M. Bay action movies, they straight expected similarity, from which this one then felt like failed to satisfy. Well, pity for them, I've really enjoyed it, watched twice, I could even imagine it to be a TV series, just to be able to slow down and open up many related points to explain, but this did not happen, it's alright.

This movie reminded me to the old ones, wherein there was no need for 6 packs of physical action in every dozen minutes with desensitized, beautifully composed ultra high definition of violence combined with virtuo-mega-explosion-porn - which this movie deliberaltely lacks to deliver.

It got reviews of being emotionless, numb, a bit sadness-tainted glassy feel throughout the whole movie, but for me somehow clicked immediately, having the scenario, putting myself into the shoes of Caster having all his possibilities and in a split second it's going away - sure there is this stereotype for aggressive killing machine tantrums for extra-tearless-fast-paced-slowmo punishment protagonists when facing certain end, but come on, the word Transcendence already suggests to step beyond our own immature depiction of entertainment and our reflection for what and who we are and where are we going...

In relation to how Dr Caster behaved in the movie with the pattern I had for instance finding out I had cancer - REALITY - it's like unbelievable, far fetched, it's not really feels real first, just like the horror and massive abuse is being shown on TV - so crisp, crystal-clear depiction, it's like a dream, streamed in 24 frames per second inducing a vivid dream state yet we refuse to realize that this is fucking real, many thousands of people just like us are being killed each day for greed, vengeance and hatred - this point of how physical reality, earth is really being is not yet comprehended, not even considered to actually see what it is how and who we exist as and what must be done to open up in order to really transcend our blindness, just to allow reality to be acknowledged, embraced how and what it is in fact who we accepted to became.

Sure movies has characters as humans do but somehow this whole impression in the movie was really what took me, but probably because I could relate with it, writing codes since childhood, learned some Artificial Intelligence at university and this is being combined with my investigation of what is really going on in existence from different angles - and all leads to one single point whether we acknowledge it or not.

I mean when you face the utter inevitability of certain death - you might consider to see yourself, the world in a different way.

For me it was similar with Caster - not that drastic, but I mean, for me 'cancer' is something what one considers in terms of 'life' - even mine was not 'serious', was handled alright, now it's gone, but still, well, from now on every minute is equally important, so I just have to remind myself to do my best, really best and thus no doubt can fit into me, I can nurture a constant self-direction.

And for that the word transcendence can assist and support to see what actually CAN and should be transcended and then comes the HOW.

I mean to acknowledge how we, as humanity as a whole currently are, the direction, the mean, the image and likeness of it, the character - it is not a nice picture, if one does not prepare to face all the abuse on earth can get crazy from it's immensity - because it is so uncool, only the really whole, stable and self-realized ones can remain really themselves in this deep hell without being influenced/lost/given up or even becoming mad yet act for all life and not lost in reactions...

It is so easy to turn our back to reality when all these sufferings influence us, we can feel sad, hopeless, lost - what experience then we identify that "what I feel is who I am, I do not feel good when I do feel bad, even if it is because how reality is, I just want to feel good anyway" - and then booooom, we look around to find something to feel good about - we are so brainwashed from our fear and tendency to dismiss, disregard reality - we re-define, twist and deceive ourselves by creating false ideas of freedom, equality: just to look at how equality now is considered to be associated with gay marriage and women's right to work or the right for to pray our own self-defined god while - and how freedom is defined as the freedom for secrecy, to buy and own things, weapons even if it means other's enslavement as freedom to exploit, abuse by the law etc...

Everything is deception in the value-system of this world somehow and to even consider to transcend is something what's definition and starting point also should be investigated within self-honesty.

I was walking in 'spiritual shoes' for quite some years and I've recognized a tendency to be distanced/desensitized from the actual sufferings of beings on earth and the inevitability of our death - in order to really let go the ego, the mind-tentacles, one indeed should let go the constant worry and false-compassion of feeling sorry for all the pain being caused in existence to be able to stand up as responsible, but it does not mean to become disregarding, to have excuses/justifications why one stops there or never even starts ACTING to accumulate what would be BEST FOR ALL.

But spiritual 'schools' already figured out a loophole from self-honest common sense point with actually make themselves believe that one first must reach enlightenment with non-attachment and meditation/attainment first and then will be able to help others, while all they do is imitating their own lack of non-attachment (btw, on meditation and non-attachment-related self-support to transcend, Sunette shared a great support once and I've made a video transcription for it, it's here) meanwhile the world system is really making earth to become a hellhole by destroying it's ability for healthy living and more and more are endlessly being abused with the totalitarian corporate enslavement to our own self-religion to energy, money, emotions/fears, hopes and neglect.

It's easy to just say 'suffering is not real', 'ego is not real', 'even our physical is not real', but how one could be more delusional than this?
Everything here in this physical is real - you will not find more real in existence than the physical here. It's not bad, it's our relationship with the physical within consciousness systems is what must be realized/understood/'transcended'. Starting with stopping the perception of separation but I walk this step by step from my point of view. First I've met this word in meditation.

So within spiritual agendas TRANSCENDENCE is a tricky one, because it should even start with the self-purification of the word itself.

Transcendence is a great word, in the system from various ways it's such a great word for providing a pricy product for the craving mind-slaves - it is a bit more direct, less ambiguous word than the word spirituality, which is like something what is not required into any sentence, like a filling, if we take out this word from a sentence, it still remains the same:

'I am walking on a spiritual path' - 'I am walking on a path'.

'I felt the spiritual connection when we kissed in the sunset' - 'I felt the connection when we kissed in the sunset'

'Let's go into Gandhi Spiritual Center' - 'Let's go into Gandhi Center'

See - it's like an energy package what seems to be different and at the same time the same for each human - yet it is like a 'filling', in fact just hiding other layers from self without realizing what it really means.

But for me transcendence seemed more like an action word, it points, moves, animates, let's see what the dictionary says about :

To transcend:

going beyond the limits of ordinary experience, comes from the Latin prefix trans-, meaning "beyond," and the word scandare, meaning "to climb." When you achieve transcendence, you have gone beyond ordinary limitations.

To ask what limitations we mean - it might also be 'personal' - for instance for me walk through self-limitation from inner beingness with want, will, discipline, diligence, honesty from deception, delusion, aimlessness, suppression, depression, dishonesty.

It suggests towards physical manifestation of being able to do better, more which comes from the inner realization of what I do not accept it anymore.

To clarify what can real transcendence start with we must be able to let go the delusions first to see what is reality here and working with facts makes us possible to really change - otherwise we approach reality with the split-misaligned perception and nothing is what it seems, nothing moves as we want, nothing will happen we desire for.

Thus I see priority by common sense to stop self-delusion first - and the Transcendence movie is specific within that because the 'protagonist' so to speak faces the fact that in physical he is lost, will decay, die but did not give up, he just explored what can be extended and expanded and in terms of inner space, inner awareness, an other platform to exist within and as: computer systems.

Many claim consciousness is life, the origin and destination, the alpha and omega of our existence while not realizing and dare to really investigate, explore, cross-reference and actually try to find the limits of consciousness.

What is consciousness and what is the physical?

What is then life? Is it determined by the organic material, the actual cells, the DNA, the information, the energy?

Obviously within this blog post there might be no answer, but more question, the ever-relevant question we are on is the one of: WHO AM I?

Especially when finding oneself within a system, which is already created, manifested, closed, very much automatized, limited, in fact programmed and as much accumulation and constant, consistent action was made to be formed like it is today - the same constant, consistent accumulation is required to see/realize/understand and then actually change it as ourselves as equal as one.

Many even say why change - ourselves, the world - it is PERFECT as it is, nothing to do, nothing to transcend except our strive and occupation for friction - and THEN we can be free of fear, the ego and thus be able to always move in harmony with everything - yet those who claim it do not really act so - do not really can actually DO anything particular - only demon-stating their choice with self-acceptance within self-limitation and not to question their freedom is like believing what is shown in movies/news that it is exactly the reality because believing what THEY experience without experiencing it is like a religion, not fact.

This self-development and the fascination with EXPERIENCE itself is also a good one to explore - what is experience? Many can say for having experience one does not require body, just a mind, a consciousness to move within and explore through - while in fact just being separated from the human physical body within perception and experience.

So then transcending the human life form, to see what is the most prominent, important point we have as issue, it is obvious if we start to explore this point from ourselves, what we, 'me' need first of all, always, constantly and see where to and whom to it is not given, provided but neglected, locked out from based on ridiculous conditions: no physical support, love, equality is existing, the patterns we imagine, desire, plan and manifest our life from are tainted with self-interest, self-delusion, self-suppression and self-defeat.

Food, water, health care, shelter, education is five most fundamental element of any human yet we are unable to provide that unconditionally and all we have is blame and excuse.

To really transcend who we really are today we must learn how to unlearn what we already have became.

Returning back to the movie once more with the 'reasoning' happened for why current human beingness is more and better by saying to exist within contradiction/friction while loving someone and hating at the same time, to have emotions, feelings while not seeing what really it is:

-Human emotion...It can contain illogical conflict.Can love someone......and yet hate the things that they've done. Machine can't reconcile that.

- Can you?
- Yes.

If we really look at it, what actually tells about us how we accept ourselves to exist and with what starting point while not realizing the manifested consequences we create in our reality: Human Consciousness is an energy-friction relationship-network conglomerate, a system, what always exists in polarities, with our thoughts/feelings/emotions hardwired into this system we are being influenced, directed, lived through these relationships separate from our physical beingness, separated from physical earth, separated from our inner self, each other, etc yet we do not recognize that we went too far and in fact are unable to stop this at any time we want, because we became it, became dependent on it, we are separated from each other, from what is here, from who we are through and as this mind consciousness system which always creates/requires energy, dependent on the substance and tries to imitate life.

Just as in the movie: Will Caster's(cool name) uploaded consciousness requires more processing power, more hardware, more energy from physical reality in order to exist, to expand, to influence, to conquer and while we are being mesmerized with this conflict in the movie among fear of change from the 'terrorists and government' and the Caster's predictable change towards technical solutions, virtualisation, connection, evolution etc, we miss the point of the word containing it's definition: con sciousness

Latin conscius: sharing knowledge, from com- with + scīre to know, as in the movie was referred to :

-"Can you prove that you are self-aware?"
-"Do you?"

And to actually see what is this self, and to be aware is also an interesting word:

aware: having or showing knowledge or understanding or realization or perception

[Old English gewær; related to Old Saxon, Old High German giwar Latin verērī to be fearful; see beware, wary]

So as we explore how this system is already pre-defined, pre-programmed, pre-ordained with words, relationships, systems and how we, individuals actually react and operate within action while what exact inner reactions, thoughts, feelings, emotions are emerging we realize that most of our existence is already created as it is and we can say that it is ourselves who decided and created ourselves to be who we are today, but then the point of self-limitation comes into the picture that what are our limits, and what are the reasons to accept those limits?

What limits can be transcended, 'go beyond'? How our limits have been created/accepted/being maintained? What are perceptional and physical limits?

Is there any fear what stops us? Is there any desire what distracts us? Why is that?

That is why I refer to the painting what is at the top of this blog posts:

Where Do We Come From? What Are We? Where Are We Going?

Without knowing, understanding, seeing/realizing these points - we are not aware, we are not transcending, just evolving the same as who we were before.

Without figuring out a way from this inequality, this closed consequence-reflection system within our own mind and shared physical reality we remain the same. And to say who and how we are is human nature is like accepting our limitation without even be aware what exactly are our limitations and why they exist and how has been created. Nothing mystical or secret exists within this or hidden magic/sacred wisdom - everything is always here - in front of our eyes, as who we are, as what we do - if we do not see this - we do not know ourselves, we do not know what is here, we do not know anything!

But to walk through the mind, the relationships, the reactions, the personalities, the words - we can learn our creation and be responsible.

The definition of god is what we define it to be - if we accept it as a higher power, it is like accepting ourselves to be a slave, trying to pretend being irresponsible yet claiming free will - it is contradiction, con-tra-dic-tion - controlled-tradition, conned trained addiction, contained dicktation...

These are the points today I reflect from this movie, Transcendence and how to assist and support ourselves from practical, measurable, simple common sense way out from our lack of understanding, from our accepted self-limitation with the Desteni message, tools, study material and group of people.

Self-forgiveness is a self-reflection, a self-direction, self-expression to explore what we have allowed and accepted to became and to realize what must be stopped and changed, really, not only in the mind, but in and as physical reality.

Word by word we re-discover our already manifested creation in the mind and in reality and taking responsibility for what we have accepted and allowed and by being aware the facts, the specific details, we give ourselves a clean vision, a new chance, and forgive ourselves for 'falling' and commit to really change, transcend.

We can talk about happiness, love, freedom of individuals, groups and humanity as a whole but the equation is pretty simple:

Give as you would like to receive.

Love thy neighbor as thyself.

What I would like to have as a human being for living, what I already have, what we tend to be taken granted while if I look at the human system many lack of and they actually suffer and die yet we seclude ourselves into the idea of lack of transcendence with reason, with clarity within friction with confusion until we all get old, sick and die while pretending to love some. It's just weird.

Everybody dies. What is the reason to live? The future, the children to come, the destiny of mankind?

Isn't that love to consider what we leave behind when we die? What to love in this? What IS love then? Is there love? Isn't our love is conditional, pre-defined, limited?

What would mean unconditional love and what it is the price we give away for our adherence to deny our ability, responsibility to transcend our limitations?

To accept people die in hunger, to not having access for water - it is our lack of transcendence - within the delusion of religion of "self-interest", while even the word shows - "self: in the rest" - I am in the rest as well, as equal, as one.

Thus real transcendence in this current scenario we are existing within is not the body to let go, not the nanotechnology to become, not to upload into computer consciousness to be faster, omnipresent, more smart but to understand that we are what we accept and allow as it is consent, it is responsibility, it is self.

Seeing human our-selves to be mesmerized, controlled, divide, separated with energy, fear, money, value systems it is inequality, it is separation from others, in fact self.

We must equalize the money point, the unequal distribution of power on earth in order to transcend our own limitation for be able to live unconditional practical love.

To equalize the money point, to manifest human right REALLY for all from birth unconditionally, equally - to have enough for living by default is already entailing much of the doable, measurable, obvious transcendence which is not in the meditation, spiritual consciousness traveling we can find, but within the simple, basic needs of a human being to give as would like to receive: food, shelter, water, health care, education.

That is my points to give into the word of Transcendence - and pronounce again - I've walked many paths within spiritual/psychedelic/shamanic/tantric 'ways' to dissolve into non-duality and try to overcome my limitations and acceptances and allowances but it is clear that Self-honesty is the eye of the needle to find out what is real transcendence - and to recognize what must be done in terms of stopping participating within consciousness systems, the mind, thoughts, feelings, emotions of polarities to let go and really change, completely, consistently within full understanding of self and consequence.

Thus for transcending one does not require anything but self to be really able to acknowledge/explore/stop and change which for Self-forgiveness is the most practical way to accumulate practical awareness of why and how to actually do that, step by step, one breath at a time.

Because with Self-forgiveness one takes responsibility as a creator/created/creation and becomes aware of self-acceptance and when facing what is being forgiven it comes 'here' - and self starts to see the details, the reasons, the starting points - which is required to self learn to directly change.

I could write much-much more about the movie, the symbolism, the characters, the ideas, the depiction of the movie, but for now this is enough, check out the hangout about it wherein with Mike and Joana (check out their video channel as well with the link in their names) we discuss similar points, 'Taking Transcendence to the next level, with destonian perspective'.

For embracing the word Transcendence I've found the most profound, supporting and surprisingly new perspective within learning about creation, existence, the mind, self-support, business, sex, animals, death and many-many more at http://eqafe.com, which I listen regularly, almost every day, because as I see it is a very strong pillar for the future of education.

Also to start practically work on self-limitations and expanding practical awareness, I suggest Desteni I Process online courses, the starter is the DIP LITE, no money is required, yet a seasoned buddy is supporting the one who starts to explore oneself within regular writing and self-investigation, self-change.

What I will continue with is Self-forgiveness and Self-correction, Self-commitment about the word Transcendence.

[JTL 138] Why I promote Living Income Guaranteed?

There are many reasons for why one can support/promote Living Income Guaranteed, there are quite some dedicated websites, articles, videos, I simply add my reasons here as I have found this as very important to get recognized, understood for what it means as the implementation of it depends on the people who realize their responsibility not only for themselves and their direct reality but all of humanity as a whole as well. This apparently hidden aspect of ourselves will be more and more revealed and realized as our accepted, maintained human system escalates to greater inequality and abuse and destruction.

Actually it is also important to realize the relationship of the individual human being with humanity as a whole as an equal and one relationship, which means what it describes: that any individual single human being is actually equal and one with all of humanity here - regardless of one is being aware of it or not - each individual is equally responsible for all what is here as we are all equally of the same substances, of the same Earth, of the same Life Essence.

Obviously it does not mean each humans has to do and be the same - but each has to understand the basic concept of our existence which is, surprisingly: give as you would like to receive: equality.

Is that even means you receive as you give? Well, first of all how we can expect something from others what we deny to even theoretically grant to them?

Is that totally cool to have food, shelter, water, health care while others do not receive such fundamental support for living?

THEN one can say he/she does not have the power, the knowledge, the directive to practically be able to CHANGE the current system towards a one which would give life-support unconditionally for all.

That would be a concept which Earth has not yet seen - but most people declare this to be impossible, because it is challenging and requires us to CHANGE individually.

THEN one can also say, there are levels of responsibilities which looks like ends with people's family, partner, even village or city by stating: "I am barely able to maintain myself, not even able to consider others, all others."

There are not much people who just can say: alright, I have worked enough, achieved enough, I am fulfilled, now I want to do other things, for other people  - no, most people do remain busy to maintain their living until their last breath.

If we see the human being as what it is: it's obvious that beyond healthy food, water, shelter, health care what forms one's beingness the most: is education, cultural imprints.

Teaching is the most important factor within a human's life if the basic needs are met - so it is obvious that how one is being educated will impact how will be able to see, be, move and actually 'live' in the system.

What is the system: our external creation, one and equal reflection of ourselves: System of rules and regulations, laws and order, mutual agreement among people what actually determines who can do what and actually how.

It is so fascinating to see - if I look back - I was not aware of these simple things - I was so busy in my head with all of my looping thoughts, trigger-able feelings, blurry emotions, avoiding my fears, chasing my desires being occupied so much to not be able to see the most simplistic points within existence which can be applied to all equally(needing food, shelter, health care, education).

I was also busy fighting for my own survival, working for my own goodies, but I was never satisfied really - as I was busy manifesting my dreams - I realized I can not participate effectively in the system as I feel like I am abusing others with the current money system rules - so my attempt was to leave the world/money-system, as I thought - "If I do not participate in it, then I am not 'responsible' so then I am really good, so then I can continue enjoying 'my life' ".

That did not work out - basically I was too split and conflicted mostly - so then I was wondering how to actually be content and satisfied - and then there was this idea of 'others' what I did not get really, only from 'my' point of view: I could only enjoy being 'myself' if I could be sure(by facts) that others are also enjoying their living.

This sounds like a free ticket in the asylum as this really fucks up the ego: only enjoy myself if I could did already all for others? In this world, with 7 billions of people how the dirty **** I could get that done?  Especially seeing the history and realizing no one did this before.

Then for a while I was screwed with mind-fucks like enlightenment and spirituality as there was this wild desire to be able to become effective, capable, stable, powerful, whole - so then I tried with those methods and eventually I had to realize these are for 'experiences' and not 'facts'.

Disregarding physical rules, systems, laws, dynamics especially with those what are strongly determining our daily experiences such as money system, capitalism while focusing to heavens, after-lifes, buddhas, energies, states of consciousness of course did not really assist me with more understanding on practical level on Earth how to change to be what would be in the benefit of all beings.

After realizing that for me zen, buddhism, meditation, energies, chakras, sacred geometry, psychedelic drugs did not help - these showed glimpses sure and then I've became obsessed with these experiences and I was still busy avoiding, judging lawyers, businessmen, politicians, celebrities as judging them being lost and denying responsibility while I felt powerless and unlucky but then I had to realize - there is nothing in this existence what I can stand as separated from - that separation is me in and as my own mind - my personal Jesus being fool-loved in the forms energy of my thoughts, feelings, emotions - which are again only: experiences, not lasting.

I've got slaps in my face, I had to realize that the accumulation of disregarding my own personal physical life by praising experiences, looking always forward from here for what I desire - became automatic, I've became obsessed with ideas unrelated to physical until I did not lose almost everything, even my physical life as I was so busy with experiences I did not see what I was causing.
After facing some eye-opener accidents, consequences I realized if I do not move myself, I will sacrifice my physical body in my one of energetic rushes for some experiences, which will then end with my total failure to satisfy myself with the simple point of being myself who I can enjoy just be as I was always sure that if I would die now, I die before I could really become who I really can be, what frustrated me more than anything, so I was able to question myself to consider new paradigms, to let go ideas, obsessions and beliefs and started to investigate more what is real, what is real power which then lead me to find the Desteni guys, with the huge amount of material to study.

Desteni I Process(which is referring to a process what each 'I' can walk who takes responsibility) is here for to assist us to understand these basics of our living: that each of us has a mind which can be programmed, in fact already programmed to accept what is here currently.

It is possible to understand how we actually are directly responsible how our mind perceives, how our beingness feels, how we react, what we enjoy, what we don't but these things are not taught in schools.

To understand that each singular thought also has consequence, that emotions are the result of programming the mind and in fact how we accumulated to be who we are today, just to mention allowing a 'civilization' which year by year causes 30 thousand kids to die which is fact and it is not 'positive', sure - but unless we do not face the facts - it is not possible to change those.
That is why it is difficult to speak up - people will judge the facts as 'negative' while can not direct their own mind to stop 'judging, feeling negative' therefore they will feel shitty so much so then they become unable to 'enjoy' their life because all of the abuse is obvious.
But walking with Desteni I realized it is about to not judge, just see what it is and not be defined by our experiences - as once Bernard told me when I asked him about shall I take a job what I judged as dirty he said: -"If you judge the Matrix, it got you".

My initial and most 'strong' resistance and reaction to share and promote Desteni I Process and Living Income to people is that there are people who actually 'feel' alright, cool, their life is not struggle and they can enjoy being human - as some of the people's reaction around me was that
-"Why constantly forgiving yourself, why don't just forgive yourself completely once and for all and then simply enjoy living?"
My answer was something like this:
-"Well, I would not do self-forgiveness if I would not need it, you can believe that, I'd be the most glad to be able to stand and say: I have forgiven all and in fact changed all aspects of me what was not fully who I really am."

But I do not know - as the 'devil is in the details' - to the utmost specificity, just like with any other physical creation: just see a computer, a cellphone - everything in it's design is very specific and perfect in order to work properly and I do not become aware how to make such things just 'contemplating on it: "computer computer computer" unless I am exactly aware of all why's and how's and then it is still a 'theory' what must be placed in physical practical reality.
It is not enough to learn driving a car from a book - I have to allow my body to learn doing it, first of all physically learning to understand the dynamics, to change those without thinking - or with guitar chords - I know all basic chords now, but I can not play songs as I have to learn to use the strumming, the melodies, the tempo, the fretting specifically, one by one to accumulate into a practical knowledge.

So first of all - Self-forgiveness is about becoming aware of actually who I am(what is actually all what is here, the concept of separation is also a thought of the mind).

It is an ability to see myself: I see what I have accepted and allowed in my existence ALREADY.

To even realize the extent I've manifested myself today here, I must realize what is here, which seems ridiculous, but once one dares to try Self-forgiveness can quickly realize: Self-forgiveness is the perfect reflection of who we really are:
If one refuses to forgive what has been already accepted and allowed to manifest in this world, meaning how exactly in physical world one is responsible for it - while does not want to change it or not knowing how to do so - always sounds like a "fuck you" to those who struggle, survive, fight and die while they facing being rejected as not accessing the basic needs for physical living.

And there is this experience <- -="" versus=""> physical reality apparent opposition thing which also twists a bit as humans define themselves according to experiences - feeling good, feeling shit, feeling okay - seems like the most powerful card in this game to prove that one is just as cool as currently being and nothing needs to change, nothing to forgive only being stimulated to have good experiences.

As within this blog and many-many other Journey to Life blogs - it is about the patterns what we exist as without being aware of: one point reveals an other and it can go as the layers, the webs of the consciousness definitions, rules, personalities, imprints are everywhere. I did 'examples on how Self-forgiveness is actually a Self-awareness reflection: as what I give for myself - and then in physical I can see: do I really give for myself a new chance or I just say it? So then it is how reflects: am I what I say or I am split between words and actions? How I do not see the exact differences of my words and my actions and what I experience while I participate within reality?

Forging experiences what overwhelm the senses of physical facts - experiences seem more intense in the mind than the reality within one is - so then to promote experience beyond facts is also a favorable - which means if I feel good, then it is more relevant than 'they do not feel good' - and there is nothing more to do but finding reasons, justifications, excuses for accepting my experiences as 'positive' being more important as their experience of 'negative' within the delusion of 'freedom' -

 "I seemed to be free to choose my experiences to be relevant, so others also can 'freely' choose experiences what they feel good about."

And then to not being able to grasp how experiences in the human mind are created, stimulated, obsessed with; means one is not able to understand why actually experiencing what, which is in fact the opposite of any definition of 'freedom' as one had no choice within becoming who one currently is: for that the specific understanding is required about how actions and consequences really accumulated.

But simply accepting experiences, accepting thoughts, accepting feelings as 'self' - is like a random possibility to 'maybe able to grasp how all are equally requiring food, shelter, health care, education'.

What I wanted to pronounce here is that there are many people who do actually feel good/great, have access to resources and blatantly able to go on like that without realizing that those who have are always more responsible to share with those who do not have.

Who do not have resources - naming it: money - do not have much choice as their only choice currently is to get food, shelter, water, health care somehow or they will be refused, rejected, disregarded.

Just try it out - go to an other country without a coin and feel good - especially after becoming ill and not having the support - I know this on personal experience: when I was in India alone without money, support and I was very-very sick - the whole world was different: I was able to focus to only the basics: eat, rest, try to be better and eventually somehow be able to return to Europe where I can get support from family, health care system etc to get healed. It is very difficult in a place like India, Bihar to fully recover from sickness without support, without money. And I was 'lucky' as I was able to learn, try and study a lot before being exposed to that, so I had abilities what most uneducated people do not 'get'. Just consider those who can not read/write - what chance they get on a decent living? Who is responsible?

Facing this world directly without the pink eye-glass already feels bad, especially when we consider facts - the billion people in poverty - to be able to consider ourselves just as equal as they are - requires ability to put myself into their shoes. No 'strings attached', no experience, no explanation - just factual reality.

Desteni message is not fluffy, it is about enslavement to realize, to prepare us to stand up and take responsibility to stop it - it is obvious that the silly idea of 'there are more responsible people' does not work, like politicians who then screw up - only they are responsible? What about the people who vote and allow them to rant with all the power what people has given permission to use? What about our current education system what is not teaching about reality, the mind, self, energies, existence but history of accumulation of acceptance of abuse, deceit, so fucking proud of our civilized standards which is basically continuous genocide and suppression - just look at the current Syria - just being screwed up for centuries and it will not be stopped and the survived people are homeless, exhausted, starving.

Myself I have never starved really - but when I did not eat for some days properly I've became quite frustrated, irritated, reactive, weak when I did not eat for a day for instance and then I have eaten, rested - but to live like that for days, weeks, years - sometimes I wonder why people still do not pillage the malls but then I realize because of the fear of being detained, shot, tortured, abused, killed- all the government is doing is protecting ourselves from each other, really - I am not sympathizing with it, it should be different, for instance implementing Living Income Guaranteed, but in fact only the government and it's system establishments are what is preventing the hungry, frustrated and rejected people to simply take what they lack by force.
But even the law enforcement will not stand a chance to stop the crowd if people will get to the point of even that is better if they are being shot than starving and being abused for decades.

That government is what we are all equal with - and those frustrated people are also ourselves.

It is time to compass us with the principle of Equality and Oneness to realize how each of us are capable to take responsibility and live as an example for all.

So my time is nearly over for today but for understanding what ALL equally need such as food, shelter, health care, education does not require to finish university nor ancient babbling scripts, neither repeating foreign mantras for energy persuaded by charismatic masters or taking mind-blowing drugs to barely be able to speak or walk properly - to simply just see our own basic needs: yaaay - it is the same for all.

To neglect that, to disregard that, to ignore that is problem, is actually a result of such accumulation which did not consider all facts, all participants with common sense.

There are actually real people who approach Desteni Group with understanding what is the Liveable Income Guaranteed and why it would be really the best for all participants - but it is not a requirement - for some as I was - it is a process to understand - first get out of personal maze to able to see and study physical reality which I was stimulated to by fed up the internal conflicts first to realize: I have no idea why these conflicts I re-create and actually how - and slowly but surely understanding how to actually stop the inner conflict, the doubt, the fear, the desire, the paraNOISE of the mind which is an instant self-reflection internal machine what we indentify ourselves with: that is problem, not only for individual living but for all participants within this human system.

Money goes almost everywhere and until each do not have access to it, which means surviving, living, growing - then there is always a division: those who have and accepting those who do not have.

Living Income means for those who do not have: there is a system maintained by all to give - unconditionally, just like the word LOVE would indicate.

For me it is obvious that our concept of love is of the mind, of experiences, feelings, of personal priority - love is a concept what is always compromised by our self-accepted limitation which is in fact who we have became.

To correct this, to re-align ourselves with such idea of 'unconditional love' would indicate the idea of 'no man left behind' - as if love is not applied to all - then that love is conditional, there is this interest which divides us within perception which is always responsibility as it has impact on physical reality, wherein, as who we exist on Earth all equally.

With Desteni I Process online self-support courses (starting with the free DIP LITE course) one can learn to understand, to change, to take self-responsibility.

If one has already programmed self-acceptances and allowances - might not want to understand their  action's consequences - even if it has impact on others - this is problem, which can be changed step by step - focusing on education(DIP, EQAFE) and supporting ourselves, our children to be able to develop common sense, be able to understand facts and realizing how the mind works which can be a tool but certainly not our starting point as energy which is just an accumulated result of our separation from who we are here in and as the physical.

See - being physical is not 'less' - identifying ourselves with consciousness systems is not 'more' - is actually less and money is just a manifestation, a representation of our separation from equality with ourselves.

Personally what went through within me in regards to money in my life was the following in the last ten years:
-Ahh, shit I do not have money for what I want to do in this world, this world sucks, humanity is fucked
-Ah fuck, I still want to do what I wanted, I have to work hard to get what I want, this still does not worthy, especially becoming a money-monger, even to participate with money feels dirty
-OMG, I've managed to escape from money system, I can live, however somebody always pays something for me, yet I can still not get what I really wanted(music instruments were these in that time)
-Olala, I do not want to say in my last moments that 'because of lack of money I did not live who I wanted to be, even when I could work as I have professions, skills, diligence, so I choose to go back into the money system and actually work
-Okay, I work and I get my instruments IN the money system, but as I see this system, it is not so cool with all just as with me - this system is full of crap - I can get what I want, but what about others?
This always bugged me, especially coming from poor family - even if I have spared some money in the last month - if my family members are lacking basic needs (for instance this winter proper shelter) - it just does not 'feel' right to buy an other expensive musical instrument while my family is freezing out as their heating system is wrecked, has to be repaired.

So then it is obvious what is the priority - even if I do not have ever that instrument(what I doubt, I can work) - somehow within Self-honesty it is obvious which is more important.

As those who march on streets in bulk for stuff what seems to be personally important for 'experiences' - will not be solution - it's like the Ship of Fools - each wants something yet not seeing the whole ship will sink while all are divided with their own, apparently 'original and valid' idea of their freedom.

I am certainly not against gay marriage, sure I support, but there are much more eager points to solve than this, such as the cannibalistic, vampire nature of our relationship with experiences, physical, life, energy, each other with the capitalism, even with the cost of destructing each other not seeing it is directly self-harm.

So Desteni I Process is also assisting and supporting many how to understand, find, develop, share Self-honesty not only on personal but on universal scale. I walk the DIP course since a while and still there much to go and previously I have finished quite some school, education out there and I never stop learning new skills but what this course shows is that us, as current humans are not understanding who and how we really are - and this course is challenging our addiction to our mind, to our energetic experiences, to our excuses and justifications for why we accept one billion people today existing below poverty line and they every day suffer more than we, who we have all fancy gadgets could ever imagine - and we have money, we have time, we have some resources, they don't.
We can not wait for the rich to save us - no one will do so - each has to stand up and as within my standing up - I suggest also to stand up with Self-honesty while becoming the living example and share ourselves by using common sense, sharing realizations and understandings what we directly walked through - phobias, fears, desires, addictions - those can be sorted out if one is dedicated and able to develop practical Self-honesty.
 
So for today that's about the current human system - and it is Common Sense and Self-honesty to be able to understand real, physical priorities - and if one lacks of these understandings, there is no excuse, there are specific facilities, courses, groups to assist to learn practical common sense, self-honesty.

For a mother it is not required to explain the child needs support - yet within the failure of that mostly all mothers of earth are in this bubble of 'my child is the most beautiful, most important' - which is then also requires remediation, self-support to stand for all life and actually what it would mean to do it practically, in this current system, today, tomorrow.

Living Income Guaranteed is a more practical, common sensical answer for the current human system's need than anything before. It is not a product what we just take and it is in effect but we must find practical ways to make it working - with current technology it is possible the redistribution of resources, the needs and goods to all. All reactions to this, to practical equality is our accepted mind stepping in automatically - that can be also understood within specificity.
At Desteni there are educators, teachers who walk already as an example since quite some years, proven that principled living is very possible and human can change themselves with dedication, consistency and motivation.

The Basic Income Grant is very cool stuff, study it, but as it is proposed, not practical, not really a solution, so that's why the Income should not be just basic, but a decent, LIVEABLE.

And there are significant differences with BIG - but the idea is the same: love thy neighbor as thyself in a practical, measurable mannerism in and as the physical reality, where our bodies with their needs are.

There are forums, discussions, chats, videos, articles, blogs, vlogs about the topic, it will be more obvious for more and more people as the system becomes extremely polarized until everyone gets it: it is about how we manage equality to manifest in the physical level.

That is why all mysticism, spirituality, religions fail big time - more and more 'scandals' come out as they disregard physical facts, priorities, common sense with separation, definition, excuses and justifications for why to accept abuse what is happening each day and to solve that always starts with the basic needs for all - until that is compromised, there is no such thing what would be more important, not even kneeling down to our own mind's creations to beg for better experiences.

That's all for today, thank you very much, I suggest to study Living Income Guaranteed:

Living Income Guaranteed website
Living Income Guaranteed facebook group
Living Income Guaranteed youtube group-hangouts 

Desteni I Process LITE - to grasp basic principles to be able to understand, direct, change our lives

[JTL 90] How Drugs Promote Paranoia part 5: Spiritual Paranoia part I.

Spiritual drug experience paranoia:

When seeking after something beyond this physical reality and defining that as more important, more real than the physical here.

When one is having hallucinations and defining those as spiritual, enlightening, blissful and relating the experience to actual spiritual/religious agendas such as Buddhism, Hinduism, Spiritualism believing that this is actually a solution for personal and universal betterment while in and as physical using systems what is being disregarded for many such as actual support by food, shelter, body care.

The perception is similar what can be found in scriptures, books referred as mystical experiences.

It is a paranoia within what one is lost within the experience, being paranoid from realizing what is here and who we are as humans is here and physical is what we are and seeing more than our self-flesh than it is and fearing from being that and wanting to be more, wanting to experience more, wanting to find other ways than physical equality. And this paranoia can be boosted with drugs, I’ve seen such things, I’ve experienced it myself and I’ve realized the Self-dishonesty within such perceptions, so I assist and support myself and others within sharing my experiences, realizations.

So spiritual enhancement with drugs(not all drug user has this mind-paranoia, but it is common).

The drug consumer experiences this oneness, white light, dissolve, an intensified energetic state, and a silence, what is kind of sexual and asexual at the same time with a deep feeling of satisfaction without the literal act of sex or arousal.

Perceiving experience of peace, connection with the world, fearless and desire-less, simply being in the now and seeing time and space in a different way with what one can observe personal life from a point of view from which the person is able to see through certain aspects of her/himself.

With the drug, especially with the ones used for ‘tripping’, the drug consumer is not really directing oneself - rather than it is a sense of 'feel and ride with the flow' however at points the experience, 'I' can be quite intense, especially with high dose of psychedelic drugs – one’s mind can totally feel like glowing and everything being liquid and natural, while in fact facing the physical limits literally: feeling like one’s brain is being electrocuted and boiling.

The effect - "trip" starts with intensifying pressure, uncomfortability and then it flips and one is losing past and future totally and losing the ability to define and grasp anything in the mind. Or it is a slow, smooth transition towards silent yet screaming intensification of all senses until all becoming one.

Everything seem as relative and multidimensional yet unrealistically changing, moving, even breathing meanwhile the body experience is different - all pain is gone(for me it was like this but others had intense pain) and nothing really seems to be sure in the space, for instance distance can be changing by how one is focusing to it and the colors seem more saturated and one can feel that energy is limitless

This experience does not seem wrong or bad – however if one defines it through memory, defines it in any way whatsoever and does not remain undefined – then there is a problem because any relationship in this existence in and as the mind is a trap: The Design of Equality and Oneness Field

    “I am only complete I am only whole and I am only fulfilled if I have a relationship with something or someone separated from me. Because have a look how has the mind consciousness system within and as human beings has been designed? Incomplete, unfulfilled, empty lonely, always missing something and now to fill that gap to fill that inherent nature experience of the mind consciousness system which human beings have believed and perceived themselves to be that by formed a relationship only!

    When they are in a relationship they are now in oneness and equality with themselves so that has been the mind fuck of this entire existence that you are only Oneness and Equality which means you are only One and Equal- with yourself Whole, Complete Full when you are in a relationship with something or someone separated from you.”

Meaning it is a partner, a religion, money, spiritual attainment, a drug, something what makes one feels whole – with the relationship formed in and as the MIND!

So within this ‘whole’ experience formed personally I've perceived that I could able to shovel away a mountain if I wanted to but did not seem relevant to physically work on things, rather than just moving towards the least resistance and observe, seamlessly flow, embrace, pacify. Even at times it was like a 'plant' experience for me, just simply being, accepting to stop being in conflict.

That is one aspect and this experience can be quite eye-opener in relation to how one is accepting to live ‘normal’ day to day living in terms of the feel of lack of harmony, connection and experience with one’s mind/one’s environment and start questioning self’s relationship towards reality and oneself directly. However without proper assistance, education on how the mind works, without one is knowing oneself the experiences will be simply unconscious/subconscious/conscious mind manifestations intensified to extreme polarities what might seem very overwhelming and within the experience one might lose the touch with reality.

Many experience quite much of fear and resistances, difficulty and uncomfortable reactions while on effect and it depends on the personality how is dealing with these self-induced magnified mind-experiences and mostly people do not desire to go further within exploring their limits and mostly it is because they do enjoy the comfortable, deep trance within people tend to hallucinate in a way what then can please themselves. However many use it as tripping to feel other dimensions what they state it is beneficial and educational for them and yet there are some who simply say these are just merely mind-poisoning hallucinations what do not have real meaning or gain, only cool entertainment or random blowing off.

Another aspect I bring in is the hallucinations, the visual, audial experiences what one can have with these stimulations can be quite astonishing and really complex in terms of geometrical patterns, apparently naturally artistic and mesmerizing intensity with apparently endless deepness which is pulling one’s attention more and more.

Photos taken from movie Blueberry

Within these experiences everything is clear, pure, shining and perfect so to speak. There is not much related to physical reality in details as there is no dirt, no flaw, just like as new, perfect geometrical patterns.

Of course this depends on the person’s mind that is experiencing it; my personal experiences were like similar to these images;

But much-much more intense, detailed, having more dimensions so to speak and always giving the impression of infinity.

I bring in a specific EQAFE interview: The Buddha Experience:

“I'm here through the Portal to share my life review in my journey with discovering consciousness and the process that I had walked in my life in traveling through the soul of mind into the heart of mind as consciousness and how the attainment of that one point introduced me to an existence of mind so tempting, so mesmerizing, so extraordinary, so beautiful that one could within that's equality with consciousness see and perceive an entire existence that was here beyond what one see with your human physical eyes and I could endlessly sit and stare but at the same time see and observe consciousness dancing with it's light and energy and sound as though it was a force, a power a presence in itself that would entertain me within myself, within my very eyes as I would simply be with consciousness as me within myself could really be like sitting and I would practice with my eyes opened and my eyes closed just being here, a silence so encompassing that every moment you are in this silence so overwhelming that tears flow with such ease and a naturalness of expression through the physical body as you merge with that absolute silence. It's a silence that's a silence, a peace, that each one of us so yearn for within ourselves. It's just quiet. ”

Just go give some examples how intense and mesmerizing these psychedelic drug experiences can be I describe some of what I had back there in my so called ‘dark ages’(regardless of internal experiences what were more referred as ‘light’, in reality as the physical I was really lost in terms of standing on the ground with my feet):

Photo taken from Tool: Parabola

• In a tent listening music closed my eyes with earphones I was experiencing like melting up and becoming a liquid entity and swimming in a field what consists of eyes, like everything is a light-eye, and I am also one of those and feels like we are molecules in an ocean and we are looking each other constantly with no blink and seeing each other constantly, profoundly and continuously flowing, meaning seeing different yet the same eyes all the time which are the same as me yet glowing, waving, throbbing while energy, information and light is what we share, connect with and as and nothing else is but this kind of fractal-like eye-field all around in and as everything.

• After having serious overdose with psychedelics, after seeing each other having direct light columns from the sky walking into this living mandala-field, within which nothing of reality I’ve seen and I was holding my ex-s hands and talked bullshit to her with tearful eyes and I’ve seen marvelous, astonishing, infinite mandala-fields, within which I was walking, like some sort of heaven made for geometry. Each step I took in physical, these mandala-systems were moving accordingly, into every direction there was unthinkable complexity within movement, detail and perfection, beauty: it was some sort of heavenly experience within which I was experiencing myself constantly, however I was holding my ex’s hands because I was in reality blind, nothing I’ve seen and it was at a dark trance party in the nature and in the darkness this light came, and it started like this future-laser light-beam was shooting tremendous information into my eyes, directly to my seeing nerves, directly onto my brain, my perceived soul, my beingness and I was completely occupied with it and then it was irrelevant that I opened or closed my eyes, it was the same, this perfect, blissful, heavenly beautiful mandala-field what I’ve experienced myself within. That was quite short compared with the usual ‘trip’ it used to last, it felt like 8 hours intensity was compressed into a half an hour but that I’ve perceived like really pushed me over the edge for a while. In that time I just started to be obsessed with Tibetan Buddhism, and it completely got me, as those mandalas and visuals are in these typical paintings, sewings, stories, it was it just being alive, like wearing a VR helmet with buddha pure land program – for an ordinary human who has no common sense and strive for cross-referencing everything what he/she experiences and taking granted only things what can be reproduced with mathematical perfection: this was it, it blew away all my doubts and I’ve felt like my mind is so inferior compared to these experiences that it is not possible that I come up with these, that I am hallucinating these, these seemed much more than I could make myself believe as self-delusion, so I really taken granted this experience as some sort of possible way what Buddhists described to see reality through the state of mind how in scriptures buddhas described to see reality as pure heavens. So that made me wonder, of course, regardless of the fact that it was a drug experience what lasted for about a half an hour.

  

  From movie Blueberry

• Another experience what was also way too much intense for an ordinary human not to conspire things when I was combining very potent psychedelic drugs with what I’ve experienced the walls of the room becoming transparent and literally seeing it flying in a star field while we as humans playing our little games meanwhile the universe’s plan is huge within what we are little programs operating as our personalities and it was fascinating to notice how our behavior and movements are related to every detail of our surroundings as one dynamic system such as for music, each other and our internal vector from which we are passing through time and space without being aware of ourselves.
• For another experience I refer to a some sort of body-switch I’ve experienced with a guy who with I was tripping and I’ve seen my own eyes for a while and it was strange to acknowledge and meanwhile at the trance party I’ve seen a huge enormous spiral going around the party and the musicians were mixing this wave within what the people were flying towards this apparently infinite consciousness system and I am there with my mate and we are standing within it’s all and I am interested in it’s end as where it goes and as it is infinite, I directly go to the spiral’s center and what I see as infinite: I notice it’s end, wherein from everything is dark and unknown but until that we are riding as all beings in this system what is taking us to the literal infinity and I see myself as little energetic knot moving an changing meanwhile moving through this consciousness field.
• Smoking from the glass pipe the invisible fog makes my last thought of 'does not effect' washed away and feeling like a torpedo going down in an ocean deeper and deeper, faster and faster like a future rocket and losing all what I feel myself to be and then standing on the bottom of the consciousness ocean where seeing gnomes singing complex, yet simplified symbols what becomes reality and seeing the people in my room around me as individual, clear symbols as well and the gnomes say to me sing reality as well and seeing my palm as symbol as well and feeling very calm
• Another experience when I was experiencing this pure white light what within everything is liquid and there are certain walls which through I cannot enter until I am not fully liquefied and melted up which through in fact I am seeing myself who I am totally disappear and this enormous amount of information is flowing through and as me and it is changing me meanwhile I am seeing everything as systems and of consciousness as energy.
• Another experience when I am seeing everything around in nature as digitized forms such as in the movie matrix but really seeing equations, anything I look to I see codes and energies moving around, what I do not understand yet I am comfortable to embrace and allow me to react to automatically and these symbols are all around me and even around people I see energies what are in fact compressed symbols for what they automatically react to.
• Another experience when wherever I look, I see sitting buddhas in energy fields, totally, perfectly aligned with geometrical lines and patterns and they are on carpets, on the curtain, in the waves of water and at the ripple of the smoke, the glimpses and bokeh of the light sources and these are sitting and being present and there is no judgment but an unified endless numbered presence of consciousness as parts of me in and as this existence.
  
• Seeing all plants as fractals, like breathing, constantly moving, and interacting between the leaflets, the branches, the patterns and the movements are constantly twirling, rippling, yet remaining the same with the impression of a some sort of Perpetua mobile, what is way far from not being aware but constantly be present and alive meanwhile never stopping reacting to its surroundings and even reacting to my observation and changing how I react to it and immediately shifting patterns, colors and whatever I look to, I find the same patterns, I experience the similarities and the impact of my attitude being reflected back how they seem interacting with me.
• Another when feeling different kind of fumes seeing very brutally popping up energy codes and symbols within what I am feeling overloaded with their robust, raw energy waves within what I feel physically bruised, my presence and mind being felt teared, like seeing behind the curtain wherein I do not have protection from my very physical being programmed to keep together in an insanely complicated yet perfectly matching order what my consciousness does not understand, comprehend as they are too fast, too much, too intense.

I do not yet have the words to explain as I’ve lost my presence so many times within these intensified sensory overloads, there were hundreds like these for sure, however what I do remember I realized: it was experience, I do not trust here today, I cannot trust, and that was not an immediate, obvious decision to make and live by but throughout the years I’ve learned the slow and hard way that what is relevant is what is really real, which is the Physical.

So I’ve had experiences like these much-much more than I do even remember to and these intensified perceptions has carved quite a threshold into my sensational definitions within what I’ve completely re-defined what is real from the very starting point of the self-definition of intensity.

These kind of references to the drug experience can be found in art, media, movies but these are merely symbols to the actual experience when one is within it, as many times the ability to define is lost, suppressed, therefore any memory, visual remembrance is merely a fractional attempt to reconstruction of something what one does not really comprehend, fully understand.

Many of my experiences I’ve seen within classical and contemporary art, rarely within video clips, movies, however most of those I’ve never ever seen, even referenced in anyway whatsoever in this physical existence, however what I had to understand that all of these experiences are completely unrelated and in fact irrelevant to my personal life, the involvement of my personal choices, decisions, overcomes, realizations and transcendence.

My issues were much-much earthier, dirty so to speak such as relationship conflicts, financial troubles, addictions and paranoia, self-doubt, fear from responsibility and always indirectly: fear of loss, fear of change.

Being ‘able’ to experience these kind of for others existing as invisible dimensions: I had no advantage, no extra information, ability to use it for nor personal or universal gain. I've only felt myself loner and different and split and misfit than others who did not have these experiences, realizing that millions of buddhists thrive for these 'signs' and 'gifts' and 'attainments' and I had to realize it is nothing, it is not real, it is not me. All I was able to is being good within make myself believe and being advanced within imagination and hoping so much to be more than who I am here than started to see what I wanted to see and occupied and mesmerized myself within consciousness for years.
The whole agenda of selflessness is completely misunderstood and based on a paranoia of judging and separating self from flesh as consciousness meanwhile the source is always the physical.
That the self of consciousness of mind is in fact illusion however the choices we make, the physical participation and the actual consequence we cause: it is real what can not be undone simply within a perceptional shift or an energetic mind state change by thoughts, feelings, emotions; it must be changed in all it's existing relationships within and as the physical and stand the test of time as self as flesh, that is real, that is change.

Also I must admit that I often experienced drawbacks and pull downs after these experiences, especially when realizing that I am ‘returning’ to my normal, mundane life experience wherein many times I was really hopeful and enthusiastic about the things I’ve just experienced however my real life has not changed expect I’ve made or I’ve reacted to it based on the judgments I had regarding to reactions to these experiences. I’ve became addicted to try to re-define, interpret and reproduce these out of mind experiences however what I did not consider that by thoughts I always ended up rehearsing the previously defined experiences based on already defined experiences in fact based on my initial judgments what I ‘brought’ from my childhood, education, impressions through my life.

Within exploring multi-dozen of scriptures and references from quite some of teachings I’ve noticed the similarity of my experiences, perceptions and altered states of mind, what I understand could be referred as different kind of psychological issues within the currently established mainstream procedures, however I was very confident that I am far from being sick or insane as I was always sure that the beingness of currently existing ‘normal’ person is in fact the absolute limitation, slavery and insanity, so by seeing people living their ‘ordinary’ life and having their apparently ‘little’ problems I was megalomaniacal on defining myself as anomaly, exception, other, outsider and nothing but ordinary and by constantly having these experiences feeling like I should listen and trust in nobody when saying to me what is reality. Later on that has assisted me to even being able to disregard all these consciousness experiences and start applying Common sense when hearing the Desteni Message for the first time and establishing Self-honesty for real.

When started to participate seriously within spiritual practice of zen meditation, Tibetan Buddhism and mantras, my mother said to me that 'you are just sitting and waiting the fried pigeon to fly into your mouth what will never happen' and after some years I was able to understand that whatever I want and whoever I am, that I must do by and as myself directly in and as the physical, so if I want to change, I should not say mantra of foreign eastern duck-sounding languages, but actually see my relationship with the actual words I react to and define myself to be and in relation to that I realize who I accept myself to be and I change that within and as myself and that I ACT, undefined, no thoughts, no feeling, no emotion, no energy, but directly myself here.

So eventually that realization and facing some near-death, physical experiences gave me the edge to fundamentally question my perceived reality and consider my experiences and self-built up knowledge(read a LOT, not just eastern stuff, western also, hundreds of books) what seemed to be burden in the moment and to be able to disregard all who I’ve defined myself to be and constantly strive for more and more new paradigms to compare to my existent world-views and within trying to apply them realizing that I am more and more confused than confident and it intensified until I’ve found Desteni, within what I was able to understand how creation and things really work and start to undo what I’ve made myself to be through debugging and backtracking and writing out all of these experiences and start facing my relevant issues what I’ve already mentioned such as relationship, sexuality, addiction, fear, trust issues to really understand who I am and what I am accepting and allowing as not who I really am as Life and I’ve started Desteni Process of Self-honesty and Self-forgiveness to decompose, let go, delete from my beingness everything what is not really me as the Breath of Life as who we are all equal as one.

I’ve made a bit more detailed within some certain experiences but I wanted to shine up some of the spiritual drug users mind from which they are defining themselves to be to realize the extent of nonsense they FEEL when one is approaching them with the common sense that ‘this is just an experience’ wherein they are really full of references of EXTREMELY intense memories what their mind has been defined as more real through the polarity dimension of intensity what is based on the energetic mind humans addicted to.

And the extent of these experiences are related to the person’s character who he/she is defined her/himself to be within what they are ensuring the righteousness for who they define and experiencing themselves to be.

Also looking back today I cannot miss to notice how my experiences were related to my readings, influenced by media as movies I’ve watched, just giving one example as The Matrix movie and within obsession it is typical that one everywhere starts to see what wants to see, just same when one is always seeing specific numbers: one is programmed to find these signs which through can interpret what wants to see, wants to conclude – and with the drugs these are intensified without one is realizing it based on the seriousness and development of obsession.

My obsession was to find a state of mind and an immediate knowledge and ability to penetrate anything in reality to experience deeper perception, understanding and interpretation because who I experienced myself to be was so limited, confined, detained and suppressed that I strived for any experience of difference. Later on that also I've found being represented within and as the Desteni Portal which is directly accessing everything in and as existence simply being HERE. I've visited, I've watched, I've communicated with the portal extensively so I am standing as living testimony and witness that it is real and more profound than anything I've ever experienced.

What I was after is Freedom, knowledge and eccentricism to not needing to identify myself with the normal, mundane human experience what apparently everyone around me accepted themselves to be and I utterly rejected in the act of quest I (was) on what is reality and who I am.

Therefore for some person it is enough one-two experiences to question physical reality, some person requires more, and there are the stubborn ones like I was who want frequent experiences to remind them that consciousness experience is superior within directly proportional to the frequency of their delusion of such disregard the only and one reality: The Physical.

And that’s why psychedelic drugs are the food of gods, the believers who put themselves beyond others based on their experience, their consciousness, their egos are perceiving these in a way poisons to the body as the substance of fifth element, the philosophical stone of the alchemists.

Meanwhile what fact is disregarded that millions are compromised on the physical level to even experience their life existence as worthy within tremendous suffering and abuse through the norms of the human system within what the individuals are sleepwalking to the fact that participating within the monetary, economic, political system each are equally responsible for the current manifestation of earth.

Therefore any experience what is not related to direct, mathematically measurable progress toward facing the systems manifested on earth which through humans life as collective is being influenced, directed, programmed towards stopping accepting and allowing abuse against life, children in the form of rape, starvation, war, genocide and environmental disasters: is in fact irrelevant and the very opposite of any realization, transcendence and  empowerment but merely an self-provoked experience-based justification for prioritizing self-interest beyond all others which is in fact the opposite of goodness.

Continuing with quoting from The Buddha Experience:

 “Experience can come in any magnificent, beautiful apparent ways. Isn't that lovely? Seeing galaxy, an universe, dancing stars and lights beyond this physical what one see with human physical eyes how one seeing that in any way contribute to a practical, physical solution to humanity as a whole.

But you spiritualists are all mesmerized with the apparent beautiful symbols, and codes and encodings and seeing apparently this great colorful and geillic things, how is that throughout time will be contributed to the physical action of making a difference to humanity as a whole? None whatsoever. Possessed with experience instead of realizing to change this earth we have to practically, physically move and do it together for ourselves and for all. I would suggest not making the same mistake I did in believing in consciousness is in anyway valid within this physical existence.”

It may sound harsh but to LIVE means to learn existence and keep which is good for all, and staring countless hours of geometrical patterns and symbols waving around will not assist and help for all the children to come equally into this capitalistic system what we are seeing more and more growing into a corporate totalitarianism what does not care about the individual, real love or compassion, only about monetary accumulation, greed, profit and the surviving of the system, which is driven by consciousness itself being superior than human individuals but existing within and as each human being as Mind Consciousness System, superimposing reality, the physical, wherein Life is merely a suppressed Essence within each equally.

And some may misinterpret the fact that mostly drugs and especially hallucinogenic drugs are illegal within the establishment systems, not because one can experience real reality, but because ones will start screwing up their programmed mind and stop being a good slave for which it might seem beneficial but each substance as has advantage, has disadvantage as well and the starting point is always because directly humans define themselves to not be able to be self-honest, able to change but only with a relationship formed with something outside and separate from self within consciousness.
Meanwhile not realizing that the starting point is always has it's consequence here specifically the already existing relationship within and as self as being unable to be whole without an effect of a substance therefore self-limitation is guaranteed without the effect unless one does not understand, forgive and transcend this initial, existing relationship with and as self: this will remain, one will remain as slave to the mind, always using it to experience this wholeness.

Therefore these drugs are not BAD, however to define the experience, to put these experiences more than just being glimpses of how CONSCIOUSNESS SYSTEMS are operating is really not practical within transcending the mind at all and reach the freedom what one is striving for reaching, attaining with these substances.

Also what I had to acknowledge and fully understand that any ‘ancient’ and ‘profound’ and ‘spiritual’ and ‘religious’ knowledge is also of and as consciousness, CAN NOT BE TRUSTED!

As having these things as starting point – common sense is disregarded, physical is disregarded, practical understanding is disregarded by praising experiences and apparent ‘divinity’ is superimposed in relation to the simple fact that each one of us requires food, shelter, real education, physical care to explore a healthy living what we all want for ourselves and for our ‘beloved ones’ – so why accepting a starting point, a system what is disregarding ANYONE? That is already a result of insanity and fear of loss paranoia accumulated into a system driven by consciousness referred as ‘civilization’. Is this really civilized?

Just see some of the most powerful, effective establishments such as countries, religions, do they really able to stand as Life as values of Real, unconditional compassion and love?

Just to notice that most of the leading countries have been raged war and enslavement, colonization and exploitation of other countries just because they can, even within this very century, within this very year! Is this right, is this development, is this evolution? That is reality, that is really the divine, profound truth, our nature what we are manifesting in and as the physical, that is accumulating, that is here as ourselves.

This is common sense and unless any drug experience is not for practical solution for this to face, understand, decompose, embrace, stand equal with and as to change for what is best for all – I say fuck all mystical experiences, and these are distraction from what is really real and important.

Now, I will finish this article today with repeating that with tremendous amount of so called mystical experiences I’ve gained nor experienced any practical ability to even comprehend what is reality and how things and creation really works except the fact that we are completely screwed within our mind in each moment of a thought, feeling, emotion of disregarding the physical.

Anyone who is not able to acknowledge this message can contact me and explain their practical solution within mystical experiences on how those will manifest a solution what is best for all within the monetary, economic, political, environmental and educational crisis we are currently facing.

I also understand, personal smoothness, change, openness towards arts, stopping several addictions and respecting ‘life’ people also ‘experience’ after psychedelic experiences but I must say that this is just the very beginning of any measurable step within Self-realization as first personal, then interpersonal and then the universal process what we must head onto as ourselves as equally responsible and take direction within principle what is best for all by the simple act of ‘give as you would like to receive’ what should not and can not exclude anyone on this earth.

Therefore any sitting back and feeling accomplished, swollen into decadence, hedonism, entertainment, party life while the tremendous abuse is taken place day by day and children are coming to earth not supported, facing abuse and war and poverty and greed is dominating: then a Self-honest man does not do such thing and it is obvious: cannot stop acting within measurable ACTION towards manifesting All Life existing within Practical Equality.
Therefore within Self-honesty one must consider after a point what psychedelics really give and for myself personally from a moment(since about 6 years) I am absolutely clear that I do not need these and in fact not really supporting me for what I am responsible for as all Life.

Anyone who claims these as ultimate tool for human betterment are in fact paranoid as already having a self-defined relationship as self-acceptance as limitation within and as self as mind and therefore should start investigating personal life and study how the mind and creation works and realize that within this era drugs are incapable of for a global solution for all therefore to push it’s agenda might be only a personal interest.

I am aware of that PTSD and veterans are handled with these effectively to let go the extreme shock and abuse what they are experiencing and that is alright, I agree, I stand with common sense and cross-referencing methods to find practical solutions but what I see at electronic parties, among hipsters, spirituals is merely hanky-panky recreational self-indulgence without actually facing and being able to stand up to directly the issues, problems, reality what are currently directing humanity’s destiny towards an inevitable doom.

I am quite aware as well of that most of the art, music, films what we see currently has been influenced by this spiritual drug perspective and it can be great within showing alternate points of view however considering these as practical solutions for all cannot be taken seriously.

I’ve walked quite some journey within the realization and acknowledging that I will not be able to really assist and support a global solution with any of my art, music, painting or video clip as these are for FEELINGS and I can make certain people feel in a certain way but that’s all.

The same as any spiritual practice within their closed groups, methods, symbolisms, rituals and feelings: not supporting physical change within absolute understanding and standing up to creation as equals. If one thinks differently, show me a Living Buddha, a Living Krishna, a Living God who deals with all systems on earth equally!

Anyone claims  any real power who cannot directly stand up within understanding and practical approach for solution to economic, political, psychological and cultural solutions should not be taken seriously at all as these are what directing humanity, not the compassion, love, light and until one does not acknowledge that: remains powerless and lost within the process of trying to locate themselves within consciousness experience and missing direct responsibility within the actual physical reality where everything can be seen, obviously, simply: here where we live our life.

• Education is required within one can self-empower to be able to see what must be changed in and as self to be able to grow up to practical solutions, such I’ve found as Desteni I Process within what one is being walked through the process of Self-empowerment of Self-honesty and Self-forgiveness to change ourselves from what is already created and being in automatic motion based on self-interest and to visibly, publicly re-align to what is really, mathematically provably can be measured as best for all.

• Living Income Guaranteed is required within what each human is respected as Life within the current monetary system to have the ability to stop survive and start living.

And why I was not able to directly see what I see today as relevant and in fact practical to understand how the current human system is manifesting disregard for all life equally? That should all start to see and explore within Self-intimacy to be able to correct Self.

My initial judgments towards politics, law, business and economy were that within these areas I’ve accepted myself as there is no chance that through that I could realize what is really going on as I’ve accepted my financial, economic, political inferiority through self-judgments such as:

1. I am poor, and universe must have ways to skip the money point to gain power as the rich ones will die equally as the poor so there must be a way out from this without money
2. Financial abundance should not be related to real self-abundance
3. Within law and politics it is obvious(based on media, local politics, movies, books) that who are in this area of power are greedy and selfish, materialists so that way I do not want to go, I do not want to participate, I need just real direct power
4. Economic is something what is based on selling, business, sales, negotiation, contracts, profit, greed what I am not interested in

So by these very four judgments I’ve rejected any investigation within the related aspects of human establishment’s and focused onto experiences as I’ve noticed how much I’ve reacted to experiences, how I’ve perceived myself to be as changed by intensified perceptional changes, feelings, reactions, so I’ve focused onto these meanwhile my physical life was not really working as

• my relationship has fallen apart
• I was not able to sustain consistent job and provide myself with financial stability
• I was addicted to sex, certain drugs to overcome the energetic intensity addiction to overcome experiences of fear of loss, fear of change

Meanwhile the spiritual activities I’ve been involved within combined with the spiritual drug paranoia occupation has not really pointed out the core of my problems, only generalized, abstract and semi-wise statements I was able to apply as energetic bandage, adhesive plaster towards my reactions to the fact that I was dysfunctional as socially, as financially as personally.

So facing that also pushed me over and over and over again trough the edge to try to intensify experiences to push myself more and more over the perceived barricade and wall standing between me and real power and profound knowledge about reality meanwhile not realizing that the self-defined barricade was in fact myself only and until starting to apply Desteni principles I was lost and I was looking after solution and myself everywhere else but where I am always: here.

Everything is here, this is who we really are, what is here, in and as this physical reality, so in search of anything sacred, mystical, religious experience of what is real we just have to stop participate within any self-definition and embrace what is here as physical as who we really are within Oneness and Equality.

So that’s all about drugs and spiritual paranoia today, what I was able to see through and let go completely.

Now, summarizing all in within practical approach:

Problem

When seeking and prioritizing after something beyond this physical reality, especially consciousness and energetic light experiences and defining that as more important, more real than the physical here.

Disregarding real, personal, interpersonal, universal self-responsibility, issues, problems and wanting to shortcut, jump to solution without practical understanding.

To Disregarding responsibility within man-made systematic manifestations as mind consciousness systems and economic, political, educational, crisis accumulated by individual acceptance and allowance.

Giving into the hope that the feelings I feel within towards spiritual techniques would lead me to real solutions not only for me but all others meanwhile to see the physical actions I take it is common sense that I am lost in experiences.

Solution

Realizing the priorities within life that each human requires food, shelter, physical care equally and to disregard that from anybody based on justification is of consciousness systems what we defined ourselves to be and act through and as its design which is definitely not who we are as life.

Realizing that consciousness is a mesmerizing, energetically addictive symbiotic system within us manifested as programmed personality in and as our mind and human physical body.

Realizing that consciousness has been deliberately designed with the perception of infinity, perfection and light in order to catch and pull in our attention from what is the starting point, the real: physical.

Realizing that with drugs consciousness experiences and perceptions are intensified while to occupation to continue to do so is justified with the hope that it leads to any solution meanwhile it is just a sophisticated form of distraction from what is important here in and as the physical, which is the source.

Realizing that any attempt for making the physical as inferior to consciousness we are directly responsible for superimpose and justify some having good and profound experiences meanwhile in the big picture nothing changing and the most of the beings are being abused and recycled just as energy source, in the economic system as simple profit-able two feet walking purses who can be brainwashed to buy things what they do not even need.

Reward

To focus what is here, to focus what is our reality, to focus what is our direct responsibility and practically work on that once we realize the delusion and Self-dishonesty within consciousness experiences and start the process of ‘coming down’ from the tree of self-definition where we hang ourselves to each day with the same patterns over and over and over again until we do not understand each steps why we make, correct each one to come back to physical Earth and stand on the ground with two feet within stability to face and deal with already manifested systems we are in fact equally responsible for.

To be aware of the traps of consciousness experiences and entertainment and hope that taking refugee within these will not assist us to a solution which is in fact best for all therefore PREVENT to be occupied, to STOP ourselves when seeing the pattern to unfold within ourselves and eventually realize

• the necessity for a Process of Self-forgiveness to change ourselves in the flesh and to investigate all things and keep which is good in fact for all is here.

• To be able to assist and support others within their self-made up spiritual delusion and stop the pretend of all-knowing love obsession and when someone is lost within feelings and experiences then stand up and express ourselves within the starting point of our realization and living example of stopping Self-dishonesty of drug-induced spiritual-energetic-addiction paranoia and start solving real issues within human society by confronting deceit, lie, greet, self-interest and give a living example of a dignified, principled, life day by day within integrity and respect for All Life Equally.

Self-forgiveness, Self-correction and Self-commitment will follow.