Sunday, January 3, 2010

self forgiveness about hair

I forgive myself that I've allowed myself to judge hairdo at all - instead of realizing that if I define me and my reactions and my judgements related to pictures - I am being directed by impulses and then I am not the directive principle here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be influenced by media, especially movies and advertisements about how a woman should look like - and then I've developed a judgement system what I use for expressing polarity system manifestation based on like/dislike - instead of realizing that this is of deception, because I am being directed by pictures, I am being defined by pictures, I am becoming pictured...
I forgive myself that I've allowed myself to define woman based on their hairdo, especially when they have long hair and more especially when they have long, curly dark hair - this is how I've defined beauty - I let this go, I cancel this definition.

I forgive myself that I've allowed myself to define that I have to judge beings in order to categorize them by their lookout in order to be able to react for them accordingly.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to believe that I have to react to beings according to norms and beliefs what are being promoted within the human society.
I forgive myself that I've defined woman by their shape and hair.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to my hairdo.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to being influenced by other's reactions and responses towards my hair.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider others especially women when I am about to change my hairdo(mostly cut it down).
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to push woman to cut their hairdo systematically in order to 'test' them - but in fact I am doing this to stabilize my accepted 'haircut' system because I've allowed also to judge to be bald is 'cool'.
I forgive myself that I've allowed myself to define to be bald as 'cool', because I've defined it based on history, movies, monks etc.
I forgive myself that I've defined to be bald as more 'transcending' than to have hair.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the feeling that I am getting rid of the layers in me what are from this world when I cut my hair and then by this being able to define myself as 'transcender' instead of being the living expression as physical change as the word as me as one as equal 'transcendence'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my hair based on it's density and itchyness and not realizing that when I am scratching my head - I am scratching my mind so to speak to induce definitions pop up related to situations where I am in to be able to react accordingly to my personality system.

I am not allowing to define me or others based on their hair - or if I am exposing myself to do so - I rather to realize how and why and by applying self-forgiveness - I am becoming aware of the entire construct of hair-system to be able to stop being defined or directed by hair in any way whatsoever.