Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Self-forgiveness: Resistances for writing Agreement course assignment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to procrastinate my writing session for Agreement course and not realizing that this will not go by itself, I must sit down and write through and if I postpone it, it will compound and direct me based on the procrastination and not based on the principle of walking self-honesty.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that if I postpone walking through resistances of actually walking through self-dishonesties within and as me, then I actually postpone myself who I am as Self-honesty.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that there is no other way than walking through self-accepted limitations and actually giving hope that it will be solved without myself actually directing everything here to stop participate within inner judgments.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that if I allow such a thought like 'one night or morning will be enough for the homework for agreement course' is actually not true, as at least two-three sitting sessions I do require for walking through a singular point properly.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I do not prioritize my tasks regarding to actual preferences based on self-honesty such as allowing myself to spend the time with others by playing meanwhile who I defined myself to be is somebody who does his homework regardless of anything.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that every time I allow resistances to stop me, I am letting the directive power of and as myself to be inner judgments instead of myself being fully here always.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that one of the most influential point within me is relationship/women/sex - and until I do not walk through each and every single self-dishonesty what I manifested as myself - until I have the tendency to being directed by my own self-dishonesties such as fear and self-judgments towards sex.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that at times I forget how much I want to walk through self-definition-based compounded energetic self-judgments what I continuously generate and discharge and who I defined myself to be is this energetic waving of experiences.

I commit myself to learn how to walk process consistently, each day no matter what, sitting down and doing actual progress.
I commit myself to walk through Agreement course as walking through myself.
I commit myself to realize and stop inner judgments regarding to my progress and efficiency within Agreement course.
I commit myself to walk through fear of realizing my self-accepted programmed behavior because when I realize it, I can not face myself continuing it as it was before realizing it, so then I must change in order to not being frustrated by my own self-accepted self-dishonesty.
I commit myself to develop a constant, stable expression of walking self-forgiveness no matter what outer circumstances I am within.
I commit myself to learn and know myself and be able to direct myself based on principle and regard what is best for all within each act.
When and as I schedule myself for sitting down and walking my assignment within agreement course, I realize I have the tendency to postpone it, so I consider the timing carefully, but once I do it, when the time comes, I respect my decision to walk this and I am aware of if I skip that time for walking the assignment, I will judge myself as 'lazy and postponing' what is unnecessary, so I rather actually do it when I schedule it to.

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