Self forgiveness: partner, father, time etc

Within our agreement I've noticed some points coming to surface when we do not agree by default.
I am responsible for some patterns within my behavior what is like as I saw my father did with my mother when they argued when I was kid. This I must explore more, it's like I have a sense on this about my father did the same yet I can not put directly into words here.

Currently my life is about to face several points at the same time what I must embrace and change to express oneness and equality with and as myself as my reality and point by point, one by one.

The points I enlist here what about I allow inner reactions to experience, starting the ones within the agreement with my partner, Suszti.

-Sometimes I behave like I am nervous, frustrated, energetically charged, wheeled up, I am reacting, I am not here, I tend to be defensive and separated. After a while I do calm down, but at these occasions I do calm down when I see my partner becoming nervous already or she just swallows it and then it's already too late because she reacted or suppressed. It's like an unconscious game what we sometimes allow to be played out and if we do not stop, it will direct us to the point of we find each other rather unbearable than 'normal'. We agreed on never arguing again, we agreed on not bringing shit up - yet sometimes it still happens. We did not agree on things to the outmost specificity.

-Sometimes I allow myself to define that I require time to be spent alone otherwise I am getting nervous again, fear of losing who I've defined myself to be. We already pushed this point, within one flat|room we must be able to do our things regardless of the other's presence. I guess it's about the secret, what I do without wanting her to know it or it's about how I define myself to be alone and within her presence - and of course: why.

-Sometimes I allow sexual desires to be compounded(it's like a default strategy to react with energy or to occupy myself when I do not like or I do not want to face reality - then sexual energy 'lifting' I start to want) and at occasions it is like wanting to burst now, regardless of reality, I just want sex and at these moments I am really tempted. When we do sex at least twice a week, it is not prominent, but if this does not happen, after some days, I find myself being influenced by sexual context within situations wherein I would not do so by my decision, it's like I do see a specific shaped or clothed or faced woman and I allow inner reaction(because at this moment I am not present, breath, directive), for instance for a moment I wonder about 'wow that ass looks gorgeous, mmmm' - and after this, I do stop, or even I do look to the opposite direction, and as like a little child, I do explain to myself that I currently have a partner, I do not want to anything happen with other girl than my partner, if I want sex, I should approach her, as she also wants this and enjoys it with me anyway, so if she is not here at this moment, I should breath and wait or act with this until we can do so, that's it.


Okay, Self Forgiveness:


Partner:
I forgive myself that I have not considered my partner as Equal and One with and as me in all ways.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that if I do separate myself from my agreement partner with any inner reaction and I continuously allow this - I am responsible for the physical consequences of separation - instead of stopping defining her as separated from me.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that if I accept and allow inner reactions to come up within me regarding to my agreement partner - I am responsible for the perceived separation from her.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that any separation I might experience - is because of I have allowed myself to define myself separated from her in any way whatsoever instead of forgiving myself for the currently allowed inner reaction specifically.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that if I am reacting to my partner's expression inside - I am not here, I am not real, I am of delusions, I am of self-dishonesty, instead of taking self-responsibility and stop reacting.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my agreement as too intense.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as automatic.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself automatic regarding to my agreement and acting with my partner, Suszti.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as I do need to rest from facing myself and her within our agreement, instead of realizing that within this rest in fact I want to rest from who I am.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as somebody who have to be alone regularly in order to 'pull myself together' as who I defined myself to be as 'alone' instead of realizing that if I define myself according to flags such as 'alone' or 'with my partner' or 'with other ones' then I am limiting myself into and as these definitions.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not wanting to face myself (at occasions, when I define it as too much) as my manifested agreement as herself and myself together as one as equal and then wanting to occupy myself with activities where I am alone.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my agreement and to be with my partner as too much instead of realizing that what I am facing is in fact myself and I must take self-responsibility in and as the moment as act as breath.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that at occasions I do manipulate my partner in order to get what I want instead of directly expressing what I want to her because I allow fear to come up within me about 'she might react' or 'she might not want to do so' or 'she might not want to allow this for me' and to balance this upcoming self-allowed fear, I use words specifically to make her act as I want to, what is self-deception.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as 'fucked up' at occasions after we do argue for a while and then I feel like I am fucked because I am disappointed, because I feel like I fucked up because I reacted instead of taking self-responsibility within the moment and act and express Self-Forgiveness within the moment and express Self-Corrective Application as stopping to participate within self definition of 'I'm fucked up'.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that if I define myself as 'fucked up', I am responsible for what I experience as I am in fact continuously allowing to 'remain' 'fucked up' instead of immediately apply self-forgiveness as the point, as the self-dishonesty, as myself as breath as physical expression.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 'feel' that I am getting tired when I do not get what I want because then I can not define that 'everything as I wanted' and then I do not experience this 'energetic state' of 'greatness' - instead of realizing that this is of self-deception wherein I do escape into occupations to not needing to face what I have allowed to manifest as myself as existence.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like I want to smoke when I can not come along with my partner Suszti, because within the past, I often smoked when I felt like I require to 'relax', instead of directing myself as breath as Self-forgiveness and let go any temptations to pace my mind and accumulate self-direction by step by step of stopping.

About father:
I forgive myself that I've defined myself as I am the continuation of my father.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my father as myself with no difference.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from becoming like my father was, because my mother had enormous fear about this and she told me so many times that she is very afraid that I might become like my father was - instead of realizing that I am not like father.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my father as somebody who is always with me instead of realizing that only my definitions and memories and inner reactions about him is here if I allow to react insider for external influences with thoughts, feelings, emotions.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react inside when others say to me that I am alcoholic because I NEVER drink alcohol since years, not even a sip; instead of realizing that this was my decision to not abuse myself anymore and not strengthen the mind with alcohol in any way whatsoever and if others has issues or pre-programmed definitions about alcohol is great, then I simply realize that this is their issues, I am done with this and I am consistent.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dislike and sometimes hate alcohol because the people around me sometimes act very robotic when they drink alcohol.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to ban alcohol sometimes but in fact I do not act according to this 'want' - it is just a some sort of 'hope' about the people around me might stop consuming alcohol.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my movements, behavior and expressions as the same as my father had, instead of realizing that I am me, myself and I can change and in fact I am changing.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to argue with my partner just like as I saw my father did with my mother when I was little.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to blame my father because he did not want to face himself and he could not take self-responsibility for himself and for his family.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from people judging me being similar to my father because then if they perceive me as similar, then I might be similar than him and I've defined this as 'fearful'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define 'fearful' to be similar than my father because I might end up as he did, died drunk in a pit, what I've defined as very shitty.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define as 'shitty death' when somebody falls drunk into a pit near the road full of water and drowning into it.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to balance my definition of 'shitty death of my father' with 'such a cool way to leave this fucking world' because my first definition was of his end as 'shameful', about what I can not really be pride.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be pride to my father and to my mother regardless of anything..
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that my father made a sport of blaming and procrastination and I learn this pattern from him subconsciously.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize what self-dishonesties I am currently responsible to express regarding to my father's personality pattern.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that the 'sins of my father' I got by default within my mother's womb through blood and DNA and that is still influencing me what I can be aware of by writing out and applying self forgiveness specifically to each point and each point's starting point by becoming one and equal as the self-dishonesty point and STOP and breathe.

Several points facing at a time in general:
I forgive myself that I've defined myself as somebody who can only face one point at a time.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself as I am frustrated when I am facing multiple points at a time wherein I must stop participate within self-dishonesties.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I am defining myself according to situations wherein I find myself in, instead of realizing that who I really am is not of momentary situations, but how I express as moment physically is who I am.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I can not focus to multiple points at a time and then within all I will fear - instead of realizing that who I am is not of fear.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from focusing to multiple points at a time because of fearing that I might fail with all points.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a man, who can only focus to one point at a time.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define women as they are to be able to focus to multiple points at the same time.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that even when I am facing to a single point at a time, I still allow fear to come up about what if an other point will come up and then I will not be able to focus to both points because I've defined myself as somebody who can only focus to one point at a time.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that when multiple points emerge and I am loosing my stable feet 'on the ground' as presence, then I can in fact stop participate within all points except the one what is really bugging me in the moment and focus only to that one as myself and realize the self-dishonesty within it and stop participate and breath and forgive it unconditionally.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to focus to only one point at a time while not realizing that it is not about the number of the points, it is about who I am within and as the moment when facing myself as these points wherein I experience inner reactions, self-dishonesties and this is my self-responsibility to stop participate in one breath.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear from falling from facing multiple points instead of realizing that in fact I can not fall, only I can face and learn something new about who I have allowed myself to become physically and what I must stop.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be jealous to people who apparently are able to handle multiple points while they remain constant and stable, instead of realizing that I also can remain constant and stable.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I am not constant and I am unstable when I define myself according to external influences by my pre-defined personality matrix, what I must learn and stop and unlearn and let go moment by moment within constancy and consistency.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize the pattern within I allow self-dishonesty within myself according to facing points within me.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that when I focus to one point to face/solve/equalize/let go/release/remove within me - then I am defining myself according to this pre-definition of 'focusing to one point' - instead of really and simply focusing to the point without defining and in fact limiting myself as only being this 'focusing to one point'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define that 'I am using too much times as 'in fact' and wanting to define myself as 'I want to use 'in fact' less' because fearing from others might define me as somebody who 'uses 'in fact' too many times'.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I define myself according to how I perceive others 'defining me' instead of realizing that it is of self-delusion.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will forget who I am if I do not define myself and the situations wherein I find myself in and as.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I am here and I am the directive principle of my life.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I allow fear of change.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I fear from chaning.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from not changing.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as 'I am changing very slowly'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from 'changing too slowly' because of still holding to self definition of a progress about in that tempo I should change instead of realizing that it is distraction from HERE wherein I in fact I am physically without any inner reaction, without any self-definition.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become nervous because allowing fear within me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be frustrated because epxeriencing that I allow fear within me instead of bringing the fear point HERE as myself as one as equal and realizing what I must let go of and I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to fear and I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to be frustrated to allow fear instead of simply let go of fear and frustration.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to energetically charging myself with continuous participation within inner reaction.
I forgive myself that I accept and allow myself to wheel up insider by continuous participation of thoughts, feelings and emotions what is directing my physical life until I STOP.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress my reactions with my partner within the starting point of fear she might get hurt by her reaction of her definition-systems of my expression.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from facing inner reactions here beacuse I might loose time what I've defined as 'never enough'.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from time is 'never enough' instead of realizing that the perception of time is of the mind.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from not having enough time for what I've defined as very important while still wanting to participate within activites what I've defined as not very important instead of deciding it within the moment and trusting myself unconditionally.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that if I am suppressing my reactions towards my partner - it will compound and it will eventually strike out and then I will not be able to direct within the starting point of self-realization.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from being exposed of what I am still accepting and allowing as self-dishonesty instead of letting all go and stop and change.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my partner to dump my nervousness and frustration to her because she is here and she is accepting me and my reality instead of realizing that what I am doing to myself in fact I am doing to myself.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to consider my partner as an other self as me and using her as an object because simply in the moment I can do so.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize when I am communicating within nervousness and frustration to my partner.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to stop within one breath when I realize that I am nervous and I am expressing towards my partner within the starting point of nervousness.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to recognise nervousness within me and defining it as 'I am wheeling, rolling' and defining it as cool, energetic, strong.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that when I am frustrated, I do not consider myself and others as here as one as equal therefore I am of and as separation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not discuss every and each point within my life shared with my agreement partner to the outmost specificity and agree totally and write it down, saying it and acting it as one as equal as the Living Word.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that when my partner does not agree with me in a point, then I do not need automatically react inside as frustrated, rejected, fearful.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to bear that somebody is not agreeing with me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from the act of somebody might not agree with me and then I might not get what I want.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from not getting what I want because then what I've defined as myself as who I am of what I want will not manifest, who I defined myself to be will not be able to manifest, so I might be not even real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from not being real.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from not being real.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from not being real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not being real is fearful.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not express self forgiveness unconditionally.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to my fears.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from being directed by my partner because I do not trust in her.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust within the direction of my partner because I've defined her as I can not trust in her.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to trust in my partner but fearing from doing so because I might get disappointed from not getting what I want.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to my wants.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to my trusts towards others.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I do want to trust in others because I do not allow myself to trust in myself.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I can trust myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from not being able to trust in my partner.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from my partner does not trust in me.

Sexuality:


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow sexual desires to exist within me instead of realizing that the desire comes through suppression.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compound sexual desires within me by participating within thoughts, emotions, feelings about sex.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize when I do suppress sexual desire in the moment.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I am responsible for experiencing desire as a manifestation and consequence of perceived separation through participation within thoughts, feelings, emotions about what I want to experience.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I fear to experience that's why I desire - or I fear from releasing the want to experience because then I'd fear from who I define myself to be is not real.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define specific women on the street as desirable because of the picture presentation I've programmed into me as desirable.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire after women as sex objects.
I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that I am participating within desire after experience and while participating within desire - I can not experience anything else than desire, the separation from the subject of my self-defined, self-compounded desire.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wonder about specific women body shape types as 'gorgeous', just because I've defined that geometric shape as 'gorgeous' automatically and giving the permission to my mind to automatically react inside as 'wow this is goergous' - instead of realizing that in fact I am only reacting to my own definitions what's subject can be literally anything based on my personality program what I must STOP.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to fight my self-accepted desire towards women by looking into the opposite direction within the fear that if I might look, I might react what I am aware of as self-dishonesty what I want to stop.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hope that if I do look into the opposite direction of a picture presentation of a woman who I already defined as 'gorgeous' - that I might not experience desire - instead of realizing that I can simply stop reacting by breathing through, by realizing when and how and why I started to define that particular experience as 'desirable' and forgiving it expressing my action as change as practical STOP.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to grab a very curly, white tight-pants-ed woman's ass because I've defined it as very attractive.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to becoming angry to women in the underway who wear de'collete' where I can see big parts of their tits because I am reacting towards them with desire what I do not want to.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself powerless against facing women who I've defined attactive because I've defined myself as somebody who automatically 'gets' desire to sex - instead of realizing that I can stop participate, I can just be here without any inner movement.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget that I do have a partner who I agreed with to have sex exceptionally and only with her - so it is not required to automatically react towards other women in any way whatsoever.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to situations instead of me myself being who I am regardless of external influences especially about women and sexuality and temptation.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as somebody who likes women.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself according to women.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as somebody who can not hold up until the right moment to act.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from not acting within the right moment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from acting within the wrong moment.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear from acting.

How I got to Desteni? Why I stand with and for Equal-Money and World-Equality?

How I got to Desteni?

I've growned up in a tiny village. My family members has some fuckups for instance alcoholic-abuse, jail, psychiatry etc. Somehow my only choice seemed to be to learn and study continuously to avoid poverty. At quite early stage of my life I realized that I can't become somebody like my family members because that is obviously limited and not really 'pleasant'.
When I was a kid, I was very introverted - my interest was nature and do things with tools, but then very soon I found that my interest perfectly matched with computers.
I had enormous fears inside of me and as a kid - I was very busy to find methods and occupations to avoid this direct, intense, tainted 'feel' of fear. Many nights I could not fall asleep as I felt like I have something huge within me what I am falling into without a starting point, without a stable ground - I felt like I am falling forever in the endless Universe.
I was able to rapidly learn the occupations from my family members what made me diverted from my fears - keeping myself constantly busy with imagination, daydreaming, thinking, even with sexual arousedness - I was able to divert my attention from how I experience myself physically here to my own created self-definition systems.
I've created several personality manifestations within myself - what were not directly related with my Physical Beingness - for instance by playing Fantasy Role-Playing Game - I've created Talamon, a powerful wizard superhero character who have no ethical or moral limitation within, who have no laws or principles what he is subjected to - a some sort of Demonic expression as a Possession of Compressed Manifestation of Self-Definition as Ego. I was very busy to suppress who I am in the physical, I started to perceive my physical beingness just as a vessel, a prison, what I must step beyond somehow - by perceiving the mind consciousness as the real power instead of my Human Physical body. With these starting points I've walked into the System and I started to learn.
I studied bookkeeping and computer programming at high school, later on I went to University of Natural Science to learn Programming Mathematics.
My path was in a way always close to drugs(until a point as alcohol) - my family members, such as my father had serious issues with alcohol - he basically ruined his life with it and he did die in a pit sunken drunk alone. That was an outstanding example of where to I am not going to walk within my life - however at University from a point - let myself to be persuaded by the roommates - I started to drink. In a way it was a wake-up from my closed-up-ness and inhibition - but on the other part - I've fucked myself up extensively by going after things what are not real for instance love. I realized with alcohol I am killing myself - I had several health-related issues because of the pattern of alcoholic-self-abuse, so I desperatedly wanted change.
After finishing the University, I've started to use so called psychedelic drugs - Marijuana, LSD, Magic mushroom, Salvia, DMT - and I've changed in a way - but within the core of my being - not really. I was always very unsatisfied with my expressions - I've judged myself and I wanted power to have freedom but something was always in the way what I perceived as I have to fight myself through. I've stopped alcohol, as it was too rude, too raw, too aggressive to my body - and I realized - my body is required to keep myself together - at least for a while - and I did not like the effect of alcohol as it brought the nasty animal from within what I was afraid of in probabilities of unwanted harm of others. So I've changed alcohol to drugs entirely.

The experiences what I went through with LSD for instance - were some sort of 'White Light' experiences what I've felt as some influence and programming without myself being really aware of them - however somehow I was able to experience the 'undefined'. I could not grab anything within my mind and the only thing I was able to repeat 'whats going on?' - after the first impacts of this drug - I experienced some sort of opening up to things - the world, my mind, my desires - but in that time my attention excluded my fears. After some of these experiences - I wanted to find the explanation of these - what I perceived to find within the 'eastern teachings'. The more I did the LSD - the more I was able to armor myself up from the things what made me appear as defensive - and until a point it was cool - but in fact by these drugs I made myself to believe in things what are not physically real. In that time I did not realize this.

With the methods, substances, starting points what I used - time to time (when I experienced loss and fall) I reflected back to my experiences of my perception of "Am I a 'better' person? Still am I 'rigid' and 'closed' and 'powerless'? "- and after some years of fucking myself up with the spiritual agenda and the drugs - I realized that the 'original' issues what I am facing since childhood - these fears, desires - are still within me - and the tools what I was using were incomplete.

Meanwhile I was regularly taking LSD and trying Tibetan mantras and meditations for instance - and I really wanted to believe that this works - so I assumed/asserted that this is the real deal - the Tibetan tantra. So I investigated it and built my life upon these principles. However something was always missing, somehow I was still seeking something, somewhere I always wanted to reach out - because what I experienced was - always flawed, was always hollow. I did not see that myself here I was missing. So then when I had the opportunity, I went to Asia - wherein I hoped and desired to find what Buddha found - I wanted an enormous validation from outside that what I do is that what I have to do.

In this trip, I fucked myself up with a relationship-related mess the second time - and I've closed myself down regarding to women for years. I was unable to handle my situations socially. In India I got sick, I had amoeba and diarrhea what made me really weak - while I was still hoping and desiring great things what I read in books and saw in movies. But nothing happened, even by walking through the 'sacred Buddhist places'(or even at the commonly accepted 'sacred' places such as Great Pyramids, Ang-Kor Wat) I've realized that this is just business - and the ones are keeping these things up and promoting aren't that valid as the 'holy books' refer to. I was disappointed - I saw the whole spiritual agenda as fake. I was very sick, I had no money, I remained alone - in that situation in India - the mantras do not help, the path of enlightenment seemed irrelevant - and in a way I was able to experience reality directly. I've seen extreme poverty and ignorance and commonly accepted child- and animal-abuse what from I was unable to escape because I have no any money. I realized that I was fucking around for years with my given abilities simply for my entertainment and justifications to not do something within the world.

After coming back from the east - I felt everything what I built up was invalid, I was still busy with desperately looking for an answer on the Internet. I've tried many things with great ease already - shamanism, zen, buddhism, music, painting, make myself busy with sacred geometry, conspiracies, reptilian agenda, egyptology, rainbow hippies, sex, porn, trance etc - but as myself was the problem - everything what I've approached was full of shit. Somehow this separation and inner judgment always came back more and more intensely, regardless of my desperate want of stopping them.

My mind as myself one and equal was the boogeyman what I continuously escaped from, fought, chased without any result.

I developed an ability to sit down and 'clear the mirror of the lake of my mind' for a while - but as I stood up from these practices - I automatically was the one who I always was. Somehow all the methods were unsatisfying. I had many friends who were also busy with the enlightenment stuff - some still doing it since long years - and I can notice even now in 2011 that they did not really change within - but they were more 'smooth' in the system but still of the system.

So in that state I've found Desteni around my 28th birthday in 2007. It was some Cross-over interviews through the Portal - maybe Jim Morrison or Merv Griffin or even a Jack interview - but it was very-very-very fascinating.

Oneness And Equality. This two TOGETHER at the first time I've heard and immediately got me. I kept myself all of the watching the interviews and Desteni videos - then I went to the http://desteni.co.za where I found the FAQ, the Structural Resonances documents, the other articles, found about Bernard, Sunette, Esteni, Andrea and about 2007 October I've joined the Desteni Open Forum. The assistance what I got was always simple and direct - I asked about the Tibetan stuff and Jack had the answer that Talamon, you keep read the material and you will find out everything by yourself.
I've found the explanation of Process, Self-Forgiveness, Self-Honesty, Writing - and I had some direct shit within me what I've defined as 'I was unable to forgive to myself' - so I started on those, and I was able to stand up for the event of 'once I did hit my dog with a stick because I was fucked up' and the other one what bugged me was once 'I did hurt my girlfriend hard because I was angry'. I wrote about these, I wrote self-forgiveness, paper after paper I've filled with writing and I had the direct Self-reflection of I am changing! After that what made my all doubts gone was the Tree of Life of Talamon video interview. After that I've realized my physical location and responsibility and I've pledged myself to the Process of Manifesting Heaven on Earth until it's done. I am walking in the Matrix to script up and accumulate influence and power within and as the system to take direct responsibility what we have accepted and allowed to manifest and STOP.

I realized that my mind I've accumulated with the continuous participation through thought, feelings and emotions - what I must stop participate within and let go of any Self-definition and Express the Living Word as the Physical.

I realized all who and what I perceived myself to be, the occupations, the likes and dislikes, fears, desires, possessions, obsessions - I must understand, forgive, stop, let go and release to birth myself at the first time.

At Desteni, the people are always ready to assist and support - and if one's approach is infected with Self-definition of perceived separation - then the Desteni guys are simply pointing out the self-dishonesty within one's approach. Then the person's decision where to stand - but what I've found very cool is that if one is not changing, but still speaking shit - then for everyone's sake - banning is applied to show what we do not accept within our reality.
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Why I stand with and for Equal-Money and World-Equality?

I came from a poor family where people had to do things what were abuse against life, against their body - in order to get the money to sustain shelter, food for the children for instance. I remember endless argues by the grownups around me - about not enough money, about wasting money, about illegal things to make money, even by harming others to get money - and I was in the middle of this resonant war for surviving - while at school I've noticed that others have clothes, toys, tools what my family never could afford. I've noticed that by my learning abilities - teachers exceptionally handle me like jewelery among others - but for instance my bench-mate was in a way rejected in the school, just because he was unable to learn specific parts of history or math. I always felt extreme limitation within my expressions because I could not afford to have a great computer or a camera while others had these and they even could not use them. It was very hard to understand why money is determining what can I do and not my abilities. I hated money, I hated my family and I hated the government, the system, humanity, even sometimes the whole existence.

By walking on Earth - I noticed that many people are living within poverty and ignorance. For long-long years it was very disturbing to me to face poverty and ignorance of it - but with the spiritual agenda(karma) I armored myself with the idea of elitism that some have more than others(aka Orwell's Animal Farm). By investigating the system - for instance walking in Cambodia, India, Egypt etc - I realized that these countries are exploited for some small group's interest - by Currency, by Military, by Media.
I've seen space-station-like high-technology skyscrapers built near slums wherein children are walking beggar skeletons - and I was unable to find any excuse within myself why should I accept this within my reality.

I've seen children doing things for coins what I never could accept as 'normal' - I've faced with child-labor, child-prostitution, extreme animal-abuse and I was disgusted from Humanity and I desperately wanted to end this but at some point I always realized - without money - I am unable to do anything within the already manifested Human Money System.

While I was unable to deal with my self-dishonest issues - as I mentioned - I was always frustrated to face poverty and abuse - because I felt myself as powerless, separated from the issue by the money point - yet I was aware of that the abused beings are in fact me - and by the continuous acceptance I was extremely irritated - what I only could suppress and divert my attention from within myself with occupation of entertainment, desires, drugs etc - but as I stopped with the act of diversion - I always faced again with the fact that Earth is not really a pleasant place, even can be called as 'hell' for at least 1/3 of the population. I started to question my continuous occupation within entertainment and desires what always cost me certain amounts of money - is this toy really important for me while others has no money to have medicine for surviving infection?

I also wanted to learn and express music and filming - and I've found that the instruments costs a lot - and I wanted to express my sound and visual perception through the instruments - for long years I used the lack of money as excuse - and blaming the system - but by that I felt myself more and more powerless. I resonantly hated everyone who I perceived as 'rich' - and at the other part of this polarity - I wanted to become rich as well.

My only chance was to place and position myself within the system wherein I can get a decent salary with what I can start to assist myself to educate and sort myself out from the powerlessness at least to be able to comprehend what the fuck is going on here and why.

With Desteni sharing - Oneness and Equality as the basic principle within and as everything - I started to understand the system as myself. I understood that by stepping out from the money system - I do not have influence within it - yet it is still determining me because I still have to eat, I still have to buy.

I've found that I have a strong tendency to want to assist and support children in this Earth - regardless of anything - because in a way I am a child, I can have a some sort of 'compassion' with the poor fuckers who have nothing but endless suffering. It is not fair.

I understand the mathematical equation of 1+1=2 - with what individuals can accumulate impact within the system - and as a group - we are able to position ourselves into constant application wherein we can Stand as Principle of 'What is Best for All'.

I realized how the current money system is abusing in the interest of greed and fear - and I realized that I must be the change within constancy.

When I heard the idea of giving equal amount of money to each newborn - I realized - this could end all family-abuse, all child-exploitation, all wars, all disadvantage by lack of education, by lack of health-care.

I've studied the B.I.G project in Namibia and I am learning how money and banks work, I realized - I can not judge Equal Money System until I never tried at least to work on manifesting it - so there is no excuse anymore - I support Equal Money System.

I stand for a World Equality wherein all can have a dignified life without condition where all beings can work on that noone should suffer because of programmed inequality within the monetary system. I take full responsibility for the existence as myself and starting with and as this Human Physical Body what is being referred as József Berta within the Current Human System.

With promoting and manifesting the Equal Money System - we can dissolve the strong hypnotic vibration of surviving and by sharing common sense - we can reach people who can also realize the current system's fuckedupness and start focusing on sorting out our perception and start living by sharing Life-opportunities for everyone unconditionally. That would mean something as Love.
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What I understand to be “Heaven on Earth” is.

Wherein Life is value, not greed, not profit. Wherein we can end wars, poverty, wherein we can support every being to face and sort out Self-dishonesties. Wherein water, food, health-care is for everybody by default.

Heaven on Earth can be started to manifest when each and every single human being is standing within the realization of the Unification of Man as I am, Here within and as the Physical as All as One as Equal within Oneness and Equality.

I could bring up many wild imaginations of heaven for instance not required to eat if one does not want to or instant teleport or flying or materializing things by self-will and continuous and constant Self-Expression for instance sounding and voicing and playing with and as Creation with and as All - but these occupations are dwarfed from the fact that first things first. Until we are unable to support each newborn equally - we must face and deal with the money issue.

We must form a Group of Equals wherein one first must walk through the Eye of the Needle to let go and sort out any influence of Mind Consciousness System. And this group is a place where Self-support is granted - and by re-defining Trust, re-defining Responsibility, re-defining Self within the interest of What is Best for All.

And walking within and as this Group - we expand and share and making sure that we are responsible for the Group as Equal Individuals and we only support Self-honesty and simply rejecting ideas coming from the Mind and only support Life - and making sure that we do not share Equal opportunities with those who are in fact harm for the Group of Equals.

That's why the Eye of the Needle is of Constancy, Consistency within the Act of Self-Honesty - to see who stands within the physical unwaving, unchanging as a stable, constant expression of 'I stand for World Equality'.
Trust must be earned within the interest of what is Best for All.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
10 Videos that you like the most / had the most impact on you

Gurdjieff: Why man must Unify
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISjipDCgP4s
SRA Structural Resonance Alignment Research Desteni Talamon
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5RBZwKWf1Y
Self Perfection while in a Limited Body and limited reality is Possible
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qPciBnE-xxc
Moments, Self Management and Osho
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HI3qyItvmLA
HOM - 103 Locating Your POWER
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNEoVyz7 ... h_response
HOM 104 Locating Your SILENCE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFJxxcce ... DBEEEA0DF6
Waking Up and Becoming Aware of the Mind in Process Support
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NTa596uX ... ture=email
Writing yourself to freedom
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4WfMno6af8
SELF FORGIVENESS as LIFE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNhfkz7A ... re=related
1 The Matrix of Self-Perfection
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zdYCmDz7Zp0

Why I stand with Equal Money System - my story of money since childhood from communism to capitalism

Writing about money - stories

I write about money - I experience some inner reaction towards money, and I simply pronounce points within my life - people's life - what are being influenced, directed and even abused by the current money system - how we humans globally accept ourselves to 'operate'.
Within an Equal Money System - things could go on different ways, especially I can refer to my family members, who are already exploited by the amount of self-compromise what they had to suffer in order to survive or in order to being able to support their family.
For instance my mother is in ruins - physically, psychologically - and there is a significant part within that what is directly related to money. And at this moment she is unable to live normally, she is taking pills every day, and visiting psychiatry quite regularly as her mind is required to be balanced chemically otherwise she is going nuts ('maniac depression') - and I've seen since my childhood how this great, strong, beautiful woman with full of potential and self-will - has became exhausted by the factory wherein she spent about 15 years regardless of for instance she did vomit every morning even from the thought of she has to go into the factory to work. Her decision was to push her limits to be able to support me and my sister to us to be able to go to school, buy the books and the tools to educate ourselves to not becoming like her - it's like a human sacrifice what millions of parents do day by day and accepting the exploitation and abuse what they face every day at 'workplace' where they are being used as slaves. This must end once and for all - I 'have' down-to-earth 'living' examples within my family and all over the fucking planet that people can barely function as humans because of the profit for those who already have more than enough. This compromise what I stand up for and I want change.

At this moment it is required to review my relationship with money, so the issues what I still carry I must write down one and equal and see what I am still accepting and allowing within myself to equate and embrace money as myself without separation to be able to become the directive principle as Life within the starting point of 'What is Best for All'.

Since a while I am earning money by having a job constantly. This has some significant impacts on how I perceive and handle(spend) money.
I start to write where I came from - from this perspective.

I've grown up in a relatively poor family where we could not afford much spending, when I was tiny(until 10 years old) I remember I was with the family(grandpa, grandma, mother, father, cousins, sister etc) - and they were quite often worried about money. They've managed to have things, but mostly because there were constantly working - grandpa in the forest, father in the collective farm(some form of 'communist' unit of the region), mother in the 'milk-factory' etc.
I remember, very often we did scouting in the fields, after the huge harvesting machines were done - as they always left for instance quite significant corn on the field - so then the whole family was out with the horse-chariot and we collected many dozens of bags full of corncob, what we after did crumbled with hand-driven machines, resulting dozens of corn for the animals what we did breed.
Since I started school, my family grownups programmed me and my sister to be as great learner in school as we can, as they perceived it as a key to avoid us to grow up into poverty.
When I was in basic school, I noticed that the others in school had more cool clothes, toys and more pocket money - to spend it for icecream or chokolate. But the monetary distance between me and the others did not seem that huge - however I often had to face limitations because of the lack of money. But as we lived in the village - there is always more easy to get a cheap but great bicycle for the kids for instance - so I did not bother much in that time...
When I started highschool - the political system already changed from Soviet Union(100.000 soviet soldiers left Hungary in in 1989-1990) and then the capitalism was officially here. Then I've noticed that some stuff is unaffordable for me what others can have in the school - the fancy shoes and clothes and electronics for instance - and in that time my mother raised me and my sister alone and she was working in the 'milk-factory' all day to be able to send us to school as her most important goal was this, to be able to afford to train us to get more proper jobs than our family members had.
Within the 'communist' system - as I perceived, she was more easily able to do so - but then the private sector started to eat up the country properties and the monetary distance started to grow between the people - more poor people and less rich were made by the new system, where the keywords were 'freedom', 'free choice', 'free religion' etc...
I had no idea about these in that time - I only noticed that from the perspective that when I was about 15 - I was jealous for the rich guys who could afford to have IBM PC - however they were unable to use them properly, and I wanted that stuff as I was already programming my little Commodore 64 since years and I wanted to expand but I could not.
So I started to place myself into the monetary system, first by forming desires and needs to train myself to be able to earn my own money to not be limited by poverty. Fascinating, and I remember the others were bullying me because my chinese shoes were signed as :Reobek, instead of Reebok. In that time I was very suppressive, so probably my face looked like constant nervousness.
However, when I started university - I was barely able to pay for the college and the food. So I applied for student-jobs, they were really exploiting, but it was money.
I remember working in a mineral water and energy drink bottler factory, I had to stand next to the production line all day and picking up the six packed bottles and putting them onto the pallet. Once the machinery stopped because of a fault and I enjoyed the brake and I stood near to the wall and held my hands in my pocket. Then I remember the director came to me shouting like hell that he never wants to see people standing like that, and then I should clean up or something and then that was the point when I realized - my mother spends more than half of her life in a place like that where dickheads exploit her by the point of money and I must expand way over this by educating myself.
Also I remember working for a car-repair-tools-delivery company by installing a DOS-based software for the workshops in the county with which they were able to order particles for cars via phone-modems. That was also a job what I felt like even a headless monkey could do after some days, but I 'had' a chauffeaur who drove me around the county and I enjoyed to see the landscapes. He told me stories about he was a taxation-inspector in the past when the communism ended, and he was facing some mafia-like organizations where they were 'bleaching oil'(attenuating fuel) and making billions of illegal profit - and he was told that if he could not stop - his house with his family will burn - so then he did quit and became chauffeaur.
Those guys handled me like a jewellery, just because I was able to speak in the language of computers easily. Yet, the money what they gave was only pocket money, however it was better than nothing, and I hated to eat bread roll only with tomato flavour, I needed to eat properly to be able to study the maths and the programming(and later on to drink the cheapest, shitty alcohol to be able to face women, but that's an other story lol).
After a while, I came together with E(first love, who later on became my wife on paper) - she had money - she was not rich, but she was supported way more than I ever could imagine.
From the moment we came together, she did share her money with me and we did shopping each week and bought lot of foods, yoghurts and all the foods what I perceived in that time as 'luxuries' - muesli, french cheese, fruits, sweets etc.
In a way it was very cool that she shared unconditionally - but somewhere I felt some frustration because I was supported, dependent by her and I judged it and I judged myself.
After a year together - I started to be part of a specific programming workshop at the university wherein we started to be educated as Java programmers with my mates from the college - and I had no PC to practice with - and E. was already more mature in this way and she told me that she invests in me in a way as she bought a great PC in that time, the price was more than 1000$ - in 1999-2000 - that money was a fortune. I remember I got the dollars from her to go to money changer - and I felt like I look like a punk crawled out from the garbage with that MUCH of money to get the local currency, hungarian Forint to buy the computer and I even had the fear coming up that I can be robbed - but then I realized, I look like somebody who has nothing but dirt, so with that I could pace my mind.
Then with that computer and with the participation in the specific Java Programmer Usergroup - I started to practically learn this programming language - participating also in summer scholarship, additionally working with Linux, what was a great financial value later on - but in that time I did not realize. At the university, the 'normal' course was more likely theory - and to learn how to learn programming. How to face totally new areas of informatics and by pushing it - becoming it's master to be able to use the computer for what they were made initially - earning money.
After the university - I moved to the capital and my CV was a bit more outstanding than the others in the university who did not educate themselves in that debth.
And I do not say it was easy at the beginning - I remember, to configure Apache JServ to even to make the server say only that 'It's working' - was days - we had to push and push and re-try and re-read - and with my mates we were obsessed to simply WANT to learn it. There was no internet in the college in that time, we had literally try every possible way to make the fucking thing work - and we did.
So, as the university ended, some international companies approached me and offered jobs to me. I remember one guy offered me to move to Belgium and he could invest in me to educate me more and give some responsibilities, but I was obsessed with numbers only - and I clearly stated - at least 200.000 HUF I want to get in my hands literally in every month, and by those offers - paying the hotel, the education and the airplanes - the final number could not reach the 200K, so I did not care.
Finally I found headhunters who could offer that much money - and I moved to Budapest to live - leaving my girlfriend a year more(she still had one more year in the city Debrecen to finish her psychology studies) - and I started to work 'normally'. Fascinating what I refer as 'normal job' here - because I already worked in many areas before, I remember when I was teen, I also did hoening with an old guy - to cultivate grapefields for instance - by that I felt like my back is spliting off,(the old guy seemed like terminator in my eyes as he did not whine that much like me but probably he did this kind of jobs since decades) but sometimes I needed the money that much.
So for the first time - I got the money what I always wanted.
I was not prepared for this - I was holding my first salary and I was wondering 'What the fuck now'?
At that company(and in this field, this is quite common) - we went out at noon to eat in the inner city - and the price of the food made my blood incendiary - but I did not care - I wanted to eat great stuff, I spent almost half of my salary to food for about a half year - for the first time I felt like I need to eat to complement my scant in this point.
Very soon I started to spend a significant percentage of my salary to alcohol and light drugs, I felt like I am a plant what started to get some water and sunlight at last...
My girlfriend often noted to me that I am wasting way too much money on things, such as food, could be bought in a more clever way, for instance by cooking to myself - and very slowly I started to get that - when I wanted to have another things, for instance a decent cellphone or clothes in which I am not making policemen always suspicious(military, 'rock and roll' clothes, long hair etc), and it was fascinating to see how people perceive me changed just because my clothes started to change - and I did not wear suit and ties - just not raunchy.

From that point - my income changed between this kind of salary to even zero for a while - but in those situations I already experienced that if I want - I can have a decent salary, and I already 'created myself'(or more likely within the system I was impulsed to became like this) - so I did not bother myself on eating rice only for a day - as I am aware of sustaining myself physically is not THAT much money - by buying the ingredients and cooking for myself - it's fragment of the price of what is the price for instance of a menu at a restaurant. It's only 'TIME' - going to the cheap place, preparing the food, cooking it, cleaning up after cooking - as I live alone - this I consider too much time, and by money, literally I am perceiving that I am buying time.
What is not always true - and at this stage for instance I am getting food ticket as cafeteria from the company what I work for - and by those tickets - I can afford to eat in canteen/restaurant or order food by runners - however I started to investigate how and why I spend money in all parts of my life and I see that I still could reduce the amount of spending for eating.

Okay, this is a wonderful opportunity to start with to see what self-forgiveness points I require to express in order to express my will to change within and as myself to prepare myself to physically change and not participate within abuse by being within and as this current money system.

That's why I promote Equal Money System as humans are literally slaves of the point of money and who do not face daily abuse - is more likely simply because they can buy off themselves from the abuse - but who can not afford to 'pay out themselves' from this - in fact virtual - debt of money - I guarantee that they experience daily life as HELL on earth, because they can not sustain their body, they can not have proper health care and they can not support their family and education and therefore most of the humans are maintaining a self-destructive(planet) system what must end by the people one by one realizing the self-responsibility one by one and stand up and form a group and say no for money being god over Life.

In fact recently my focus started to move more and more towards money and people around me tend to judge me that I am changed and my interest is only money - but in fact if I want to make a change WITHIN the current system, I must be able to stand one and equal with the money - to direct and accumulate money by the principles of Life.

I will continue this post by walking through this timeline and forgiving any self-definition what I still accept within myself regarding to money.

I dare you to educate yourself on how money REALly inpacts daily life not only the people in western culture, but all over Earth - and even often I get the feedback that if I refer to poor afrian or asian children - they say it's only manipulation to get money from people who want to appear as good - but this is real, people, these are physical beings, and there is no any luxury or any entertainment within this world what could be more worthy than supporting Life within a being, not only human but animal or plant as well. But the point is that we must approach the core of this abuse, and my partner often says, if I would really care about those dying brown-skinned children, then I could adopt as much as I can and support them. It's partially true - but the whole system we must focus on to understand and change from within - because I could adopt even 100 children by myself - the current system is continuously producing poverty - and that we must stop directly.

So I make my stand obviously as All Life - and I do not allow middleground in this - and by that I support even those who oppose me - by reflecting back what they still allow and what I can not allow as 'myself'.

So I dare you to stand up for an Equal Money System - and if you do not get it - study, educate, empower yourself with REAL, practical knowledge, about how to stop self-dishonesty within ourselves and within the world One and Equal.

Thank you very Much

a company

About the company: it is strong and aggressive and has a significant domination in media industry. By this direct presence within people's mind - who are constantly subjected by these perfectly designed artistic tales, stories, animations and of course: advertisements - and by influencing humans to buy the products of this company, regardless of it's high price.

Because they know how the human mind operates, how to 'catch it' through the visual and the story and the characters and then so to speak: just pull the people into the creator's world and then take them to a ride within their mind because when people at home watch media, it's like they are with a family member - or in a cinema where it is huge and loud - it is the same. From the moment the human watches a media - the media directs the situation and humans tend to make apparently logical connections, associations, memories, specifically pinpointed with these pre-scripted stories and situations and by the words combined with the music - humans react with emotions and energetically intensified moments can be experienced.

These experiences what they will try to re-experience but in fact to find, when people start to do as they see it constantly in the media.

Or it is on unconscious level and it is like a random pool of memories and mind-connections but the more is being filled up with this specific media from this specific company - the more chance that it is being manifested in real world because humans are being directed by impulses coming from the unconscious. It is us but we are not conscious of it - but it is here - and we do not see it.

We do not see a part of ourselves who we are in this moment and that's why we do not know that we do not know and that's why we are not real.

Because we are being directed by media for instance.

Because this specific company walks as it walks as the law allows. Lawall.

We must learn how to stop the mind domination - the conscious, subconscious, the unconscious mind we must walk within full awareness and practical self-corrective application by releasing any memory, any definition, all judgment, all emotions, all feelings, all thoughts - they are not required - but for the man to be the unification, all must be stopped, released, removed completely.

If we would have this rate of media publicity - it is direct power over the mind. Because if we do not direct ourselves as minds as one as equal to correct our physically manifested consequences, then the mind directs ourselves into absolute self-deception, self-abuse, self-exploitation, self-destruction. It is clear that we humans lost the directive principle, only our mouth 'walk', our mind 'move' but not as Human Physical Body as direct physical beings within and this reality. We must move ourselves breath by breath otherwise the mind we can not release - not the mind is the nasty in fact but we, who participate constantly, repeatedly, consistently.

This is the absolute self-deception, the starting point of nothing. Within consciousness - the minds are nothing. Nothing constant, consistent - but the humans are related to the mind constantly, consistently. See? Way over we lost everything and we are starting from scratches, yet judging the amoebas as lower 'level' life form as they are 'just' one cell but we are not aware of any of our cells.

cellphone

cell ph one

sell ph eno

sol

Power of the mind is the power of the deception.

Power is deception.

Power is not real.

The people who buy this specific company's products - obviously can afford to do so. This is an important point in this. They literally buy into this and with that money the company can expand - and then it has more media presence and then it can 'walk into' more human minds and then those will buy more products and it is all about this word 'buy'.

Because at the moment not everyone can afford to buy such products - only a very few - related to the whole. And this few has the privilege through having money - and they can literally buy these experiences from this company, but the others can't.

Within an Equal Money System - people would not distinguish to share with others regarding to financial status in the money hierarchy, people would not make decisions according to price, according to worthiness of revenue.

Because sometimes(if not always) the income is made through exploitation, through harm, through abuse - regardless of the amount, it is unacceptable.

The current Law System is protecting the Abuse through Money in the name of 'free choice', in the name of 'democracy' and in the name of 'free market' - but these words are deceptive - as in fact there is no free choice, there is no free market, and there is no such thing as democracy literally - as by definition it should mean that the nation is directing but in reality - the nation is being directed by definitions coming from a few who has control over the media for instance.

Within the Current Money System Who has significant power within the media industry - is only interested within revenue - what is coming from the people who the media experts learnt to entertain, to influence, to manipulate by and as their mind. There is nothing personal within this existing - it is simply consciousness network manifestation within the physical.

Banks support Inequality, Separation, Elitism

My mother called me because she got a letter and apparently I've been approached the bank, where my salary goes - and because of salary is more than a certain amount(~1000Eur) - I was able to change my contract to some sort of 'VIP', what would mean the followings:
-I do not have to stand in lines to have assistance in the bank, I got a person who I can call and deal my issues with directly any day.
-I do not pay any % for money transfer, account fee, SMS-prices, most of the ATM-usages etc
-I get 'better' investment offers, deposit rates than the 'usual' bank users.
-Better credit card opportunities, more debt allowed etc - lolol

This clearly means: the bank disregards the poor for the benefit of the rich.
I would say, it would be much better if this would be the opposite - the poor should not get plucked by any % - rather the rich should be.
This is an other example of the ruthless system what measures 'living'-qualities by the people's money. It's the same as the cast-systems where the outcasts have nothing and they are disregarded by the system, by the members of the system, because they are not supporting the system. Because they can not, or because they refuse to. But anyway the outcasts are very busy with surviving, so they are occupied, so they can not influence, change the system, but the system utterly determines their reality anyway - as your money, as your quality of 'life'.
That's why we must realize within ourselves one by one that the quality of Life is at least the naturally distributed Equality System, where none of the members are disregarded, only because they do not have money.
What is the worth of happiness for me if I am aware of the sly metal claw of this money-pyramid-consumer-addiction, a self-abdication where a Self is not aware of All Self Here as Equal as One, yet still responsible for the determination of Reality without even being aware of it only for self-deception, otherwise Self would Change.
Changing Self requires changing the System of Life - the Value must be Life - not allowing anyone to be harmed just because some have more money and they say so. Those who has money and fear from loosing it, probably they're right - if they would not direct the current Human System with metal harshness, probably they would kill each other in years. But if we explore the Principle of 'Equality and Oneness' - we can research, dig out what Really Matters, here As Physical as Substance.
And if we can not Live All Equally supported on the Physical level - we do not exist as Life, we exist as a Programmed System, which will end inevitably, as it is not aware of that it is destroying itself before even realizing what is happening.

The Solution is an Equal Money System what means the maximum amount of money is divided equally between all humans and each newborn would have well enough money for:
-Support the Human Physical body with proper food, shelter, healthcare
-Support the Being with Education - how Reality works, how Self moves, how through the mind humans deceive themselves and others
-Support the Being with Pure Self Expression as Innocence as Life as Infinity

This would obviously mean that most of the crimes would disappear what are about the money.
Also this would mean that each child would have equal opportunity to Express Life - everyone should become aware how painful to
-tell your child, that she/he can not do who they really are, because the family is poor
-being told that you can not be simply who you are, because you have to fight for survive.
Within an Equal Money System - those competitions what abuse Life would stop - no more raging 'religional' wars for resources, no more nervesick jobs for resources where people have to win and loose for money.
The banks would put together the money - what is already in computers anyway - and start to support an Equality Group - wherein the participants would be supported in physical level and they would research and implement the New, Global Equal Money System - and then Humanity would start to learn how to take responsibility for themselves and for the planet.
The planet is going fine, but the living conditions are going down quite fast - the environment can not take any poison, it starts to give it back to the humans - and the humans can not stand up for this global changes because they are divided, separated, different intents, agendas - therefore if we do not unite within One Global Group - the environment issue can not be handled within sufficient effectiveness, therefore it is a must to bring about a change within our starting point from profit and energy to Physical Equality.