Last time I've wrote about how I've allowed myself to program myself to fear from failure within self-definition of difficulty and limiting myself at scenarios when I automatically react with thoughts/feelings/emotions with no self-trust, no self-integrity.
I will continue in the next moment writing the necessary steps to stop the insanity within myself by directing myself and my mind as thoughts+feelings+emotions to eventually unify and stop myself right here in and as every moment of every breath, but this moment I express my point of view of the 'character of the human being' to directly see how I am and within what relationship I stand with this within and without in and as the reality as the Physical.
These Self-forgiveness statements assist and support me to become aware of what I've been doing within myself and the solution is simply remain here and stop and commit myself to not go into the same reactions by scripting myself 'up' so to speak for simply re-program myself to become aware that I can choose to not participate and explore what is beyond self-definitions within fear.
Self-corrective and Self-commitment statements assist and support me to prepare myself in the moment within the physical participation in the Self-dishonesty - to remember that I've been doing this a while and within Self-honesty and exploring writing in Self-intimacy through applying Self-forgiveness I can in fact stop and change.
However the real, physical application of Self-forgiveness is required when I am within the choice of participating within the self-accepted program again - or to stop - but for to be able to stop - as Gurdjieff wrote "to stop the machine, it is required to know the machine' - and when the machine knows itself, it is no longer a machine, it starts to become responsible for it's actions".
So every human who is giving the excuse for not changing, not stopping within, as the inner energetic mind machine based on river-like thought-streams, constantly occupied within having good feelings and disturbing emotions - and without as the currently accepted human system, as the capitalistic, cannibalistic abusing profit-and surviving-oriented self-interest-based money system - is simply stating that:
-we are machines and we can not change,
-it is not meant to be changed,
-it's human nature, it's who we are,
-it's god's mysterious plan,
-there always will be OTHER assholes and selfish bastards
-money is the root for all evil
-you, Tala, do you think you can change the system what is here since thousands of years? Give me a fucking break!
-we all are originated from infinite self-aware consciousness energy, the physical is just an anomaly what is irrelevant
-we just have to meditate every day and not even need to know how our mind works, but the eastern techniques work, really, but within meditation all will be solved, maybe not in this lifetime
-"I can feel the grace and love, if you do not feel it, you are just negative"
-there is good and there is evil and that's the truth, no more questions, that's "my personal" experience, you must understand that!
and all that kind of different types of justifications I can hear every fucking day(even from the 'closest' ones), however when someone is, as an individual directly facing immense shit, suffering, abuse for instance(and I am being creative here however I know some who have this currently being 'exercised'):
-working like a slave since long-long years from 6AM for directly the surviving without EVER thinking outside the box and accepting it yet slowly but surely feeling like being broken day by day
-the bank wants to get back the credit what one's got for you and for your family for instance and mortgaging any of your belongings what is not human flesh, but might that will happen as well
-one's dear loved ones explode with a hi-tech or home-made-budget bomb in the name of imaginary immortals or for some insane uncommon sensical conviction
-having multiple cancer all around one's body from all-hiding corporate aggressive brainwashing food-poisoning copyrighted+government-protected 'market-strategy'
-not really being able to think outside of the box of surviving and trying to pull together the necessary coins for one's kids and stopping the resonant tremor when thinking about how to give to one's child what will be required for a healthy life what would mean at least millions of money and blaming the system, the rich fuckers and even oneself for the decisions one has been made in the past what had consequences already one cannot change or even comprehend
-facing all-stinky begging home-less broken-down human-wreckages all around in the city every day
-meeting some extremists like 'sports fans' mobster within their aggressive-all-destroying alcohol-frenzy
-dodging extremists like nationalists/nazis/demagogs/re-divisionists moving and clothing like clowns/clones in singing half-drunk bunches for marches
-one's boss or the boss of your boss or the boss of your boss's boss is proving to be incompetent however you get the consequences every day yet the money is not that bad compared to others in general
-basically noone wants to acknowledge that we are doomed in all ways possible(just to mention water and food situation) if we do not change the core of our systems
and then there are the ones are already bit more ready to change, to actually do something or at least try for their own self-interest within their own self-developed fear from experiencing the only real thing in this existence what we all sharing equally, what is physical consequence.
It is fascinating to see that apparently there are people who directly pulsate, resonate that they are within the awakening and self-realization and all kind of occupations what they've defined for themselves as 'good' and 'useful' and 'beneficial' - all type of activities or passivities what within they find themselves doing so meanwhile being in the state of doing exactly the best possible thing for themselves and for the world however when someone is asking some direct questions about the abuse and the massive horrific events taking place every fucking day on this planet: everyone is proven to be absolutely powerless and reality-denial within some sort of hypnotic hope that their 'own' life might end up different than the other poor fuckers happened to be experiencing this one beautiful life as something what really-really sucks.
And I must put into this that I am not really different, as I've emerged, as I am experssing today is the same - however what I've been doing within this blog as investigation and self-assessment and writing out all the shit I see within to at least to acknowledge that I am far from the 'optimum' how I can explore what L.I.F.E would mean within and as each given moment and obviously can be noticed right here within this blog that I do not accept all the bullshit about any justification and excuse of why we humans can not really change ourselves who apparently 'happened to became' and the currently 'running' (amok) human consciousness global profit- and fear-oriented all-agreed self-interest-based money- and value system.
And I am not standing alone within directly changing myself from within - hundreds, thousands are busy investigating and W.R.I.T.I.N.G as much as they can to -at the first time- become really aware what we've been doing as individual and as a group as referred as 'human beings' to our- and all other selves without being able to stop even for a moment from the program running within who and what we've accepted ourselves to be and become and actively remain within an interest what is not visible, what is not transparent, yet for us, who write the Journey to Life: is obvious, because we dare to see and we dare to do the steps even if it would take really long time - it is not even a must - I am experiencing this lack of separation from writing day by day more and more stabilized: I am writing and I am preparing myself to change in reality when the moment comes and then I do change without any con-dition to walk out from this per-dition what we've became.
And one can say that life is good, beautiful and shining and colorful and fucking awesome and immensely cool, but how comes that we are not even ready to acknowledge that we all eat, drink, shit and sleep the same way and without that we are screwed beyond any measure, and if we do not want to give that to all, everybody without any con, then we each individual are pledged for all other's direct hell-experience without even wanting to acknowledge.
I've been defined(mostly by myself) as many things since I walk on this mudball floating around, but in fact I am a talking and eating and shitting flesh walking around and apparently doing things without any direction for decades but if I can choose what direction I want to walk - it is not a question that I want to get food, water, shelter, health care and REAL education about what the heck is going on.
And to want this for myself, to have a great life for myself, and the ones who I share my presence with - should also get this otherwise they would not be really a pleasant and cool and awesome and fascinating experience for me, not even for themselves, because without eating for weeks, or drinking anything for some days - all what we define as human is gone, diminished and here is the real zombie apocalypse.
Personally I've seen it in Both-Gaya, Bihar, India - where we went to seek the 'enlightenment cave' of a dried fucker who we believed that achieved something awesome by sitting in that cave for long time) we were covered by beggars for biscuits(tourists apparently like to pet them with that and the jeep drivers were happy to sell us some) they were really just coming and held out their hands and repeating the same 'biscuit', 'biscuit' 'biscuit' and looking into their eyes I've seen myself directly within reality once and for all yet I had to stand up and help a girl around who was giving biscuits to them so then they rushed her so much that I had to pull these weak ones from her because they were literally like zombies in movies except not biting but literally wanting to bite some biscuit.
And the most horrific was to realize that none of us who did that visit apparently felt the same as me or made the decision to at least try to seek out or want to move out from this kind of 'position of perception' - even some 'mates' like to visit from time to time for the 'mysterious enlightenment cave' - and being able to completely ignore the suffering by perfected justifications and excuses for how they are screwed because of their karma regardless of being old ones, young ones, or even really young ones - and I can at least respect that how much a human can program itself to be completely ignorant for it's own kind.
And all those western money-bags visit India for enlightenment while locals serve them like kings for the all mighty $ - at least for the illiterate starving beggars they are only that.
And I could write dozens of similar experiences, not just like - I was there and broke my little heart and feeling guilty for having hi-tech audio equipment what costs more than the house I've been raised in - in fact I have a courage to feel the shame for what we all became and I feel responsibility(yet I must walk my individual process of Self-honesty and Self-forgiveness for myself what I've manifested as fears, desires etc) - and I am sure I want to change the system from within with Basic Income and Equal Money what more and more will start to consider as the current system collapses while still there are many who think that by meditating anything will be better but intensify to the utmost degree.
So Enlightenment? Now you give me a fucking break :)
Meditate on physical reality how practically can be solved by it's core what is obviously the money system.
Meditate on physical reality how you would feel physically and act when you would end up the same way as are being abused by the money system, judged and determined by their lack of money to live beyond the edge of the happiness machine.
Meditate on what you would do if you would lose everybody and everything and there would be nothing to generate good feelings and experiences from?
That is compassion, not just thin-king and feeling energetic love and shining and imagining sending it to each heart - or some consciousness shiva-buddha-liquid imagining or consciousness mantra-symbol ball shooting into pure-lands bullshit!!! That's absolutely irrelevant for the abuse and suffering on Earth - come on! What would you choose if you would have the same situation as those are being disregarded by the money system? Imagined energy ball meditated by hundreds together holding hands - or some bread and butter and water and shelter for -20 celsius degrees?
Common sense - common sense is free and is here!
We use words, we react to words, we make business by agreeing on words, we feel happy or sad by words, we allow ourselves being programmed by words, we program our children by words, we hide behind words, we fear from specific words, we judge words, we react to words, we are driven by words, we are being directed by words, then we simply say words are just words when asking to investigate our relationship and starting point to specific words what we repeat like hypnotized such as 'love' and 'happy' and 'innocent' - if you buy or sell ANYTHING - there is no such thing as innocence.
We must sort out our already existing relationship within and without based on words!
Prepare yourself to be able to be a constant and consistent inner emptiness self-directive principle by direct decision within the Physical to stand up and become equal as one with the current system and change it as self within common sense based on the interest of what is best for all. Simple.
So then I come to the definition of what is human, what means to be human and for me is simply that I want the same things for others what I want for myself - and myself, being at least absolultely fucking self-honest without any doubt that I do require food, shelter, water and health care:
I want the same for other humans as well - and wanting that and actually doing something for happening so - is a totally different scenario.
Within writing and applying the Self-forgiveness, Self-honesty, Self-direction and Self-changing - I've came to the realization that it is absolutely irrelevant what we, as individuals hope, want or even feel or perceive if it is not physically manifested within the reality what we are sharing equally - and to investigate all things within reality to explore what must be stopped, released might does not mean in the first moments about how exactly, practically we would do that - but once it is clear, that we must stop as humans, as within as this self-perception-wanting to just -feel-good programmable organic robots.
And within Desteni - a research and practical 'projects' and 'experiments' are going on since quite some time - and there are solutions what already proven beyond any measure, what currently a thinking/feeling/emotionally charged human mind can comprehend - but the tools for stop the mind for a moment - (and for another moment - and for this moment, and for this moment too) - to clearly see that Equal Money System is really the thing what is Best for All.
It is simply the equal distribution for the basic needs for everybody - without fearing MY interest that then the others would dominate us within THEIR self-interest - education is the solution for that - it is very possible that there are some who are all-ready will not change, but eventually will die - maybe in 5-10-20-50 years and in fact what we educate and plant as seeds as Life will grow - as we can plant Tress what will be huge and supporting in decades - that we can do with proper education for the children who are obviously ourselves, what most only can feel with their own children but you must understand that there are people who can 'feel' that with all children on earth without any exclusion. And the harm and abuse for many-many children on earth is proven to be manifested in reality every day until we do not change ourselves and the money system.
Religions, spiritual, any self-convicted all-gather-together *-ism groups of interests have no power over reality, they only can think of themselves, regardless of what they are deluding their minions with - that's obvious. That's why they do all their 'specific' 'shit' behind closed doors and in secret and in fact for the same as all others: money and survive and feeling go(o)d.
Investigate, do your research, it would be a shame if you would judge Desteni-EqualMoney-Equal-Life people before even trying for yourself, but for trying it we must conclude as effective group of individuals made the decision to stop this madness and really make our and our children's future possible in the best way possible.
And before finding Desteni I was already sure that it must be done, but I was not aware of the most practical tools and I've been trying many extreme ways in my life to be able to at least to stabilize myself for a moment to - at least! - to see what I am facing as myself and the human system - but I could not. I could stop the thoughts but only by sitting in a dark room for weeks - for what? I had no gain any practical power over myself or over the monetary situations - because I did not consider common sense - and common sense is acting and not sitting that's sure. Or one can say that for rehabilitation for a moment it can be accepted for see how insane our mind works like - but to not write down, to not forgive, to not let go, to not correct the same loops happening again and again and again is simply nonsense...
And to acknowledge that was not a simple, one-blinking process, that I was clue-less, power-less individual, who had even the best intentions within to make myself and the world better, but I was literally walking in oblivion because I've not given myself the most basic, simplistic tools: for give myself what I've been lost and was always looking for and in fact all every body is looking for within all different type of scenarios : the Breath of Life all ways HERE.
Use the tools and Stop the jungle of thoughts and feelings and convictions, come and look out from your head, HERE is a LIFE emerging within and as the Physical. Not beautiful, not really loving - yet but at least it is real and we can transform it to be what is best for all of us practically!