No god, no buddha, no science, no love, no family, no government, no money, no happiness, no pain, no time, no space, nothing
just breath
for fear that think that who I am, what is happening, what to do and how things are, damn!
I am breath I am life, nothing seriousness, no compromise
From now I do not allow anything less that who I am.
I have accepted that the world is like this, because of me, me as Talamon myself has also accepted, participated in that the world is like this - what is, how can I say..the other part of me - everything is the other part of me, because everything is whole only with everything - and realising that what I have became from that perspective what is called Earth - it is only just a fail, so I apply those specific decidements that I do not accept any manifestation of mind: no feeling, no emotion, no thought - because these are actually disturbing me in that I be me always that who I am, not going into any little compromise to be me.
For me has became obvious that I only trust in my honesty, no other else, and yes, if I am honest, it came surface that damn, I am addicted to my own mind, and for those what I am doing in this mind - but if I would just breath silently than it is different...I could define that: easy, squarely, sure and me
- If I do think, it is that like some strange acid would blowing in my head, and some electrodes are buzzing..
- If I do emotion, strange warm, penetrating all of my trunk by apparently pleasant feeling fills me, I could say intensely
- If I have feeling than for sure that I do something what I am not...now I have the feeling like this,
- after I have feeling like that etc...
I see theese like rubberbones throwed to me by my mind and warns me to breathe. And this opened me for that why theese are existing...
Always this was concerned me:
Where thoughts came from: I was not honest to me, I had some attributes whose I wanted to hide - instead of say theese out, act theese out, unambigously stating out.
2 comments:
When I think, the more I follow a thought the tenser an area of my head gets until it manifests into a headache XD. When I have an emotions, it works as usual for one second then it slowly becomes superficial, and then I "gain" the ability to stop completely. So cool. Breathing, if I've stopped a thought would suddenly pop up saying "1234 hold 234" etc.
cool...now i experience for example while clicking around the net, my breathe can be more less aware..surfaced..not quite deep, just like little ones, and thoughts come
...and i experience what? no thoughts, and breathe, and use 4count, but like that: i open myself more: and as I open myself as the breathe, one onion layer opens, and others comes to surface: as thought:)
yes emotion is obvious cooool
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